No kissing.

[LA1988]

I have been on 3 amazing dates with a guy. Hes not my usual type & thats a good thing because my usual type always ends in heartbreak. He makes me laugh, we have great banter & get along really well BUT after 3 dates he still hadnt kissed me so today after another great date (number 4) I moved in for a kiss when he was hugging me tightly and he moved away to avoid it. I asked him if there was an issue with us kissing & he replied with he doesn't kiss unless hes in a relationship with someone. When I asked why he said its because people spread germs etc & hes prone to coughs & colds. He then went on to say single mums are the worst because their children always get ill. I was slightly offended because he knew I was a single parent but also explained because im a qualified nurse that colds etc are viral so even hugging me or me touching a door handle can spread viruses & he just shrugged and said thats just the way i am. I then asked when it comes to being physical with a woman (even if he isnt in a relationship with them) does he not kiss them leading up to the actual deed & he again said no he doesnt. He then hugged me again & left. The reason im asking for advice is because kissing is a big thing for me. Even if a date has gone bad I allow at least a kiss on the cheek but kissing when being physical with someone is a big part for me. Am I over thinking this? What is your advice in this situation?

I think the lack of kissing is least of your troubles. An axe and dirty work clothes should have made you run for the hills 😂

People who dislike or are terrible kissers are always terrible in bed in my experience.

I don’t actually really even go out being honest 🤷🏻‍♀️. I don’t have any interest .
I have 2 close friends , we meet for lunch , walks .
Work & teens keeps me busy .
I like to keep fit , read .
It’s nice to go on dates here & there , get dressed up , dinner/ drinks .
Even if I was a socialiser , I’ve zero interest in the single locals here .

I did have a panic on but he said it was from chopping wood for the aga & fireplace in his house which he did show me photos of so thought i might have judged too quickly. Hence allowing more dates but always made sure they were public dates. Never went to his house or let him come to my home.
I do believe if we had been physical it would have been short & more for his needs/benefits than my own. He did drop hints during date 2 but I switched subjects.

Me neither in the last 2 years I have been on night out 4 times. I have 2 friends that I have known 20yrs we meet up for meals with or without our kids. Their both married. Rest of my time is university & being a mum. It was their idea to join dating sites & I was really reluctant but after the last couple of experiences I know why I was reluctant 😂

He sounds extremely weird even without the kissing thing, I think you would be best to drop him. Why would single mums' kids be more germy, why would sex be less germy than kissing, plus the axe, the dirty work clothes..nope.

A friend of mine dated a guy who acted very similar, even moving with him across the country to live together. When the relationship ended (after he came out of the closet) she told us how he would never kiss her and would rarely have sex with her. Even then he demanded she shower for a set number of minutes.

He's a red flag.

We sound quite similar 😊.

I actually met a guy through work April 24 , attractive , down to earth , we clicked . He asked me out twice but I said no , simply because if it didn’t work out I’d have to keep meeting him at work .
Roll on August 25, we reconnected, he had moved on through work again , so great this time around, started dating .
Had a lovely weekend away , other dates were day/evening dates .
Then beginning of October we met up on a Sunday , another day date , had a fab day , he was to come to mine following weekend to stay , kids were going to be gone on the Sat night .
Then I discovered I had to work that Sunday , no getting out of it , no biggie right 🤷🏻‍♀️.
Well it certainly was , he texted me & dumped me cause I asked could we do following weekend instead !!!
Said he couldn’t see things working out & all this bullshit .
I literally said to myself , Fuck this dating crap , done with it for a while .
Never heard from him again .

You’re bothered about the lack of kissing when he was driving around with an axe?!

this is a nice early red flag for what a nightmare he’d be to be in a relationship with her! It’s one thing to be germophobic, but you do have to actually understand germs or you’re just making up random rules. Also, is he suggesting that he does have sex with women outside relationship but does not kiss them? That’s just bizarre!

I agree with you, kissing is very important! I’m certainly not getting into a relationship with a bad kisser!

An axe? Was he a tree cutter? No kissing- nooooo