Silent promotions

[adhdmom]

I work in a large company (think 50k+ employees, publicly traded) in a historically male dominated field (engineering). I am a woman.

After two children, a very litigious protracted divorce, I finally got my career (and life/sanity) back on track in 2021. I switched jobs, started fresh. Since then I have been promoted twice. I would say this is faster than my colleagues, not the norm. But I believe I deserve it. I am intelligent and hard working.

In my company, it is standard for a manager to send email announcements for promotions of their direct reports. My manager has skipped the email for my promotions both times, while he has sent the email for other people been promoted to the same positions that I was.

I can't help but feel "less than' but at the same time, my logical thinking tells me I am the opposite. My manager made these promotions happen for me. He requested them, got them approved... I know I have his absolute professional trust and respect.

So why are my promotions downplayed by not announcing them?

This is Mumsnet 😂

Should I post on Reddit instead? I am sure my colleagues won't dox me here 😛

I wanted unbiased opinions. I have been brainstorming with a friend and nothing makes complete sense.

It seems like your visibility is being intentionally minimised to avoid provoking resentment or questions around how quickly you are advancing. Quiet promotions keep others calm, while still benefiting from your output!

You could pen your manager an email saying something like “I’ve noticed that my promotions haven’t been publicly announced. Visibility is important to me for my development and contribution. Can we discuss how recognition works in our team?”

This forces the manager to justify the behaviour, without making it too personal.

I am trying to articulate why it feels wrong to me to ask for a justification.
He has fought for these promotions for me, secured me a compensation package technically above my level, and asserts my authority in public. He treats me as an equal. I have the power and the substance, just not the fanfare. Asking him 'why' sounds hostile and I feel it cheapens a relationship that is working so well.
I suspect the lack of announcement is to manage 'tall poppy syndrome' that he may be shielding me from (even if I don't feel the jealousy from peers yet).
But there is another layer: A friend thinks he has an emotional connection to me, and that celebrating me too loudly would feel too vulnerable for him or open us up to gossip about favoritism. We are both single, which I think heightens that risk.