Separation advice

Catza · 16/01/2026 10:59

I am no solicitor but the house is a marital asset and you are both entitled to 50% of it. Maintenance is a completely separate issue. With your kids being 16 and 18 you don't have enough years to "save up" his maintenance money to offset what he is legally entitled to anyway. But, again, this is a completely separate issue and if you feel he should be paying maintenance (and he should!) then claim that regardless.

UnemployedNotRetired · 16/01/2026 11:03

Getting out of your marriage for a £5k settlement will be a bargain compared to trying to get a better deal from solicitors, if he digs in his heels on this.
But claim CMS, it will only be for the younger child for 2 years max anyway. And will just about make up the £5k in 10 months from what you say.

Big caveat -- if either has a decent pension that could be worth rather more than the equity.

Woodfiresareamazing · 07/04/2026 19:02

SeptemberFlower · 16/01/2026 10:30

know I’m going to get told to see a solicitor, however I don’t have a lot of money, and I need to know if anybody can give me advise from their own experience.

Me and my husband separated last January, and he moved out of the house, we have 2 teenage dd’s aged 18/16 but still in full time education.

We had been renting since kids were born but bought a house for the first time a couple of years ago, the deposit money came from my parents, and due to the amount of time we have had the mortgage there isn’t a lot of equity in the house
– around £10000.

He went staying with his parents and lives rent free with them, this means the kids cant stay with him and live full time with me. I felt guilty as I was the one that ended the relationship, I didn’t ask for any child support from him
(based on his salary the child maintenance calculator says he should be paying around £570 a month)

He has now come at me for half of the house, saying I should be giving him the £5000 so he can move out of his parents. I don’t know where I stand, part of me feels like I should just ask him for the maintenance for the kids, even though
I can just about get by without it and save it to give back to him for the house, but I was hoping a solicitor would be able to work something out where I can keep the house and not take anything from him.

You could possibly do a deal with him to keep the house - offset the equity against a year of maintenance which would be £6840.

Usually child maintenance is payable until they reach 18, or until they are through full time education. So you can do a deal on that too possibly- decide if you need any CM at all from him, although personally I wouldn't give it up completely.

Woodfiresareamazing · 07/04/2026 19:08

SeptemberFlower · 16/01/2026 10:30

know I’m going to get told to see a solicitor, however I don’t have a lot of money, and I need to know if anybody can give me advise from their own experience.

Me and my husband separated last January, and he moved out of the house, we have 2 teenage dd’s aged 18/16 but still in full time education.

We had been renting since kids were born but bought a house for the first time a couple of years ago, the deposit money came from my parents, and due to the amount of time we have had the mortgage there isn’t a lot of equity in the house
– around £10000.

He went staying with his parents and lives rent free with them, this means the kids cant stay with him and live full time with me. I felt guilty as I was the one that ended the relationship, I didn’t ask for any child support from him
(based on his salary the child maintenance calculator says he should be paying around £570 a month)

He has now come at me for half of the house, saying I should be giving him the £5000 so he can move out of his parents. I don’t know where I stand, part of me feels like I should just ask him for the maintenance for the kids, even though
I can just about get by without it and save it to give back to him for the house, but I was hoping a solicitor would be able to work something out where I can keep the house and not take anything from him.

Did you ring fence the deposit from your parents?

Crumpet444 · 07/04/2026 19:15

Buy him out for the 5k but get it drawn up as a consent order and approved by the court whatever you do… with a clean break so he can’t come after you for more.