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Original poster

I need to pull away from him.

4 replies

tartifl3tt3 · 14/01/2026 15:08

Hello everyone.
First of all, sorry for my english.
I'm in last year of highschool. For context I moved abroad when I was 16. There, I met new people, including him.
I had a few relationship in the past, but nothing came close to what love feel. I've been with people because of dependency or obsession but it never felt that healthy.
So I started to develop a crush on this guy last semptember (so a year ago, and at first everything was normal and like usual. But then, we started talking and I feel like I'm starting to develop feelings for him. I'm not talking about butterflies in the stomach, we're way beyond that. I love him for who he is, even his flaws, his qualities... literally everything. I also feel like the feeling is mutual, even if he didn't said it, at least there's interest on his side too.
But I know next year I'm going back to my country, and I know I will probably stop seeing him. What can I do? How can I stop my feelings from growing? It hurts to think about it but it'll hurt even more when I'll be attached for sure. It's certainly for the better.

OP posts:
TheClawDecides · 14/01/2026 15:14

Are you actually dating him?

Sorry, it's not very clear.

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 14/01/2026 15:38

Nah, fuck that. Enjoy it while it lasts. Most early relationships implode at some point. And usually messily, with one person hating the other.

This one won't (presuming you are actually dating him, as a previous poster says, it's not clear). It'll be a nice clean break, because you'll be leaving. It's cirumstances ending it, not someone fucking up. You won't end up hating each other.

I had 5 proper relationships in my late teens / early 20s before I met my partner. 4 of those 5 are tainted slightly by the way they ended. Either because I feel guilty because I did something stupid, or because I remember how horrible it felt when I got dumped, or because the memories of the arguments were unpleasant.

The other one of those 5 was with a woman I met while I was travelling. We lived in different countries, so we did the long distance thing for a while afterwards. She spent a few months living with me, I spent some time in her country. And then it ended, because long distance just doesn't work. But I remember it as one of the best periods of my life, and it's not tainted because it didn't end with either of us hating each other.

You're going to have a lot of horrible experiences in your life. Almost everyone does. You can't let the dear of them stop you going for what you want

Original poster
tartifl3tt3 · 14/01/2026 20:20

TheClawDecides · 14/01/2026 15:14

Are you actually dating him?

Sorry, it's not very clear.

I’m not dating him no, sorry for confusion

OP posts:
Original poster
tartifl3tt3 · 14/01/2026 20:24

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 14/01/2026 15:38

Nah, fuck that. Enjoy it while it lasts. Most early relationships implode at some point. And usually messily, with one person hating the other.

This one won't (presuming you are actually dating him, as a previous poster says, it's not clear). It'll be a nice clean break, because you'll be leaving. It's cirumstances ending it, not someone fucking up. You won't end up hating each other.

I had 5 proper relationships in my late teens / early 20s before I met my partner. 4 of those 5 are tainted slightly by the way they ended. Either because I feel guilty because I did something stupid, or because I remember how horrible it felt when I got dumped, or because the memories of the arguments were unpleasant.

The other one of those 5 was with a woman I met while I was travelling. We lived in different countries, so we did the long distance thing for a while afterwards. She spent a few months living with me, I spent some time in her country. And then it ended, because long distance just doesn't work. But I remember it as one of the best periods of my life, and it's not tainted because it didn't end with either of us hating each other.

You're going to have a lot of horrible experiences in your life. Almost everyone does. You can't let the dear of them stop you going for what you want

I’m not dating him actually, and I had horrible relationships in the past but this “situationship” (I hate this appellation) has been going on for a longer time and it’s so much better, like no concurrency between us, no useless jealousy or childish problems, we just pull each other’s up even tho we’re not dating

OP posts:
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