I am with the father of my two children - 2 under 2. He also has a son who is 7 with 50/50 custody.
I feel like I am just the childcare, cleaner and cook around the house. He is a night owl and will be in bed until at least 10am every morning, whereas I am up with the children from 6, 7am. I don’t begrudge that as he will do a night feed with baby if it’s before he goes to sleep around midnight/1am. He drinks heavily at the weekend or as such the Xmas period so he is often not back before early hours.
I suspect of him cheating as there had been occasions of him not coming home. He has said he’s stayed at friends but I have this gut feeling that’s not true.
A mutual friend of ours was accused randomly by other women of “snogging” DP in a local pub. I know it wasn’t said mutual friend however it has put real doubt in my mind of another woman I know who looks similar and I suspected he stayed at hers a couple of months ago.
Me and the children live in his house, when I separated from ex my profit from house sale has dwindled and I have hardly any savings now. Even my car broke down terminally a few months ago and I just don’t have the funds to replace yet. I feel trapped. I don’t know what to do. When sober he is lovely, a fantastic father. I just do not trust him once he’s had a drink, nor do I trust the women around here knowing he has children and a partner at home.
I know I need to leave. I am on the council list for housing which is closed over Xmas but I will reapply when something suitable is available again. Even logistically I can’t go anywhere with no car. I thought about going away for a few nights, give him time to think, maybe realise and for me to arrange with family a stop gap; but I can’t get to the hire car place on the bus with toddler and baby and only one car seat.
I know there isn’t really any advice I can be given as I know the answer, so I’m sorry for just getting it off my chest and ranting! Here’s to 2026 eh!!