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Relationships

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To Swipe or Not

8 replies

Frankiemf · 31/12/2025 08:09

Earlier this year I joined a local lesbian social group and we go out once a month etc.

When I joined there were two in the group who had a flirty relationship and had kissed a few times. I will call them A and B. On one of these nights we met someone who was not part of the group she liked B. A had started dating someone by this point who she is still with.

So B then stated dating the woman outside of the group but always seemed hung up on A. Long story short they dated from around April to start of October. In the meantime I had gotten to know the woman outside of group on the nights out because we were both quieter and in the background.

She was always great to talk to and a generally lovely person which is hard to find nowadays. Which leads me on to she has now popped up on my dating app.

Do I take a risk and swipe or not I’m mindful that I don’t want to upset anyone in the group (even though a lot have dated each other) also she might have only been friendly because we were all out together then I will feel like an idiot.

OP posts:
Angela59 · 31/12/2025 08:20

Maybe talk to her privately but directly?

Good luck x

Richandbeautiful · 31/12/2025 08:20

I wouldn't, too much drama.

friedaddedchilli · 31/12/2025 08:30

Lesbian dating life is basically a rota. Your turn for a shift together.

Frankiemf · 31/12/2025 09:11

Angela59 · 31/12/2025 08:20

Maybe talk to her privately but directly?

Good luck x

Thanks she’s not part of the group anymore and not in contact with anyone from there so I’m not sure how I would go about that x

OP posts:
Angela59 · 31/12/2025 09:36

I see
definitely let her know your interested though x

ComtesseDeSpair · 31/12/2025 12:28

If you swipe and she hasn’t done / doesn’t do likewise, she won’t know about it as you won’t match, so you won’t have to feel silly. You don’t have to see her again anyway. If she was still part of the group then I’d say no, because yes, it’s likely to flare up drama, but as she’s not it’s not quite so incestuous. friedaddedchilli is kinda right though and I did lol: all the gay women I know who met through lesbian social groups have dated each other in shifts.

Frankiemf · 31/12/2025 14:08

On the app I think she will see likes but like you said if she doesn’t swipe I’m not likely to bump into her so I guess I have nothing to loose

OP posts:
blankcanvas3 · 31/12/2025 14:14

Definitely swipe

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