Why is my husband irritated with me so easily?

[Stardust127]

hi

im married with a toddler and currently 30 weeks pregnant with our second baby.

me and dh have always had such a good relationship and he’s incredibly supportive with everything. But he gets so irritated with me, so easily. He’s very snappy and questions the way I do things at times, simply because it either irritates him or because it’s not the way he would do it. He doesn’t see the problem with it and thinks he’s just asking me a question, but the truth is that it’s more of a rhetorical question with a tone.. I’ve brought this up but as mentioned he doesn’t see a problem.

as I said, all other aspects of our relationship/marriage is absolutely fine but it’s this one thing and it annoys me. Has anyone experienced anything similar? I’m just trying to understand what is actually happening.

please no ‘you should leave him’ comments because I’m just not going to do that. This is not something that warrants walking away from a marriage

thank you x

Think you made a typo. You in fact have two toddlers.

Maybe he’s irritated you can’t remember how many kids you have! 😀

That’s a joke btw before everyone piles on.

Because he is annoyed by you.

I’m assuming it’s a change and he wasn’t always like that. Some men just don’t like how they are no longer the centre of their partners world anymore. Many relationships falter when children come along they become everything and the relationship becomes neglected.

I got annoyed by my ex because he was really annoying. In the end I couldn’t bear to be with him. He was like that from the start though- yours is recent.
It’s the change in role. He’s struggling to adjust.

I think it’s the old “familiarity breeds contempt” problem.

Call him out on it gently and remind him it’s not okay to take out his frustration on you.

It sounds like the dynamic between you has shifted and he no longer sees you as an equal. Are you financially dependent on him?

I had the same issue. When I was on maternity leave my ex spoke to me as if I was stupid, over small domestic stuff, and it caused a lot of friction.

When I returned to my career, his perception shifted back and I was the competent head of dept I had always been, but by then it was too late.

You need to talk it through with him. Make him know how insulting he is being.

People get irritated by others when they didn’t used to because:

1. they are temporarily tired
2. they don’t like them any more
3. they don’t like the new dynamic

2&3 are huge problems.