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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I the one being unreasonable here?

12 replies

ILoveNext · 11/06/2008 13:32

Both me and DH work full time, we have a 3 year old DD and a 6 month old DS.

Last night we both got home around 5-6pm, had tea etc and DH went to football practice. I put the kids to bed and he got home about 9pm. I was knackered from a) working all day and b) having to deal with the kids on my own again all night.

So I went to bed at about 10.30pm.

At 11pm he woke me up saying the baby was broke and I'd need to call the doctor why couldn't he phone the doctor since I was in bed???

So i phoned the doctor, explained symptoms etc and was told that the doctor didn't do call outs but I could take him to the 24 hour drop in centre. I asked DH to take him as I was not dressed and half asleep...he was said he was too tired from football and I was a bad mother for not wanting to take him to the surgery (I knew what was wrong with him and it could have waited until the morning IMO).

So I had to get dressed, do my hair, get DS dressed etc and off we went.

Didn't get back until gone midnight, the doctor couldn't fix him (which I knew he wouldn't be able to do much) so all I came back with was a still broken baby and a bottle of calpol (of which I already had bottles in the cupboard).

I told DH this morning that I thought he was really selfish last night and he reckons I was the one being unreasonable. I had to get up at 4am this morning again to see to DS, DH wouldn't help then either.

OP posts:
herbietea · 11/06/2008 13:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Twinkie1 · 11/06/2008 13:35

Was it one of those pretned babies - can't imagine why anyone would describe a baby as broken otherwise?

aGalChangedHerName · 11/06/2008 13:36

Eh? Broken baby?

StripySails · 11/06/2008 13:36

Wind-up right? Broken babies, taking baby out at midnight (and stopping to do your hair and get him dressed too) when you thought it wasn't necessary?

If this is serious then your husband is unreasonable, but you do yourself no favours either.

ILoveNext · 11/06/2008 13:38

No he just has a cold and I think its agravated by hayfever as I have hay-fever really bad and need steroids etc. He couldn't breathe too well which is why I took him as I wasn't sure if we could use vapour rub on him as he also has bad excema. DH said that if DS stopped breathing during the night it would be my fault

OP posts:
TheProvincialLady · 11/06/2008 13:39

If my baby was ill I wouldn't fight over who was taking him to the doctor. If I was idiot enough to marry a man who wouldn't take care of our children I would divorce him, but only after taking the child to the doctor (without doing my hair).

TheProvincialLady · 11/06/2008 13:40

OK I have just read your last post and I was a bit harsh before but honestly, I cannot imagine having a row with my DH about which of us was too tired to take our sick DS to the doctor. You do have a few problems if he is that selfish.

ILoveNext · 11/06/2008 13:41

When I said "do my hair" I just meant tie it back as I had gone to bed with it wet and it was stuck up all over. I just mentioned that because it was something else DH wouldn't have had to bother with and he was already dressed.

OP posts:
Tortington · 11/06/2008 13:42

i am not sure how your arguments are going - but i would tell my dh to fuck right off

am sure someone will come back with a better response.

but i am sure that i would say " how very effin dare you insinuate that i am a bad mother, worthing full time and atering to a family where we both have responabilities - your not an effin caveman and i am not your effin slave - you better but your god damned effin weight around here you shit becuase i am not standing for *this bull SHIT any more

mumblechum · 11/06/2008 13:43

Custy you're such a fluffy little kitten sometimes

posieflump · 11/06/2008 13:43

yanbu
He should have at least gone with you

SummatAndNowt · 11/06/2008 14:41

Is this a one-off? If not then it's not about which of you is reasonable or unreasonable on this one issue, it's about your whole relationship.

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