Partner is being so nasty and I’m ill

[Wheezybreezy]

Hi, first time posting here so please be gentle. I have been in hospital since Tuesday as I got flu and I have severe asthma which was exacerbated due to having the flu. GP sent me straight to hospital due to my history with severe asthma (been hospitalised numerous times).

My partner is never supportive when I’m ill. Tbh when I’m ill he becomes extremely nasty and it’s like I’m the world’s biggest convenience and I’m putting it on.

Long story short since Tuesday he has been extremely nasty, it’s been an inconvenience for him to bring me stuff to hospital. Last night he came to hospital and was in a stinking mood because he got soaked. He puffed and stomped about and then sat on his phone. I have just got discharged a few hours ago and said I’d like my favourite dish to eat as the hospital food wasn’t great. He then started shouting, getting angry and stomping about. I said to him about how he has been the last few days and he’s saying I’m at fault. I’m in tears. He’s now away out on his Xmas do. AIBU?

You do not want this man in charge of your medical decisions if you are incapacitated. He is a danger to you and your wellbeing. There is nothing more important than your health. I know it's hard to leave but you are not safe with him.

Make this the last year, and give yourself the gift of freedom for Christmas.

He’s a pig. You wouldn’t treat an enemy like he’s treating you - and he’s supposed to love you. He’s vile.

The law has changed and just by having your children around this nasty abusive man this is classed as child abuse as far as the law is concerned! Tell him to get out of your house and change the locks and do yourself and your children a favour and put the garbage out before Xmas!! Also go on the course women’s aid does so you will
learn what domestic abuse looks like and how to avoid going for men who are abusive in the future

what a shithead. asthma is life threatening. i actually lost a parent at a young age to asthma. thank goodness your imbecile DP hasn’t put you off getting treatment at least.

btw OP this topic comes up over and over again on MN. Woman ill, partner angry with her for it. it’s appalling and yanbu.

Im guessing you pay for everything and do everything around the house too ?

When I was a teenager my mum told me that it's very easy to be happy and 'loved up' in a relationship where everything is going great. It's when there are problems, such as ill health, when people show their true colours and a relationship is tested.

Your partner is showing you that he doesn't care if you're ill, he doesn't see it as his job to look after you, he doesn't care if he makes you feel worse, he has no care for your feelings.

Please leave him.

I feel your pain…. if you can, get out, I know it’s not always a simple solution. I didn’t and now rue the day xx

He doesn't love you or care about your health
Get out asap

100% My DH is Jekyll & Hyde. Week of him at home now.

Do you have to make Christmas happen now as well, OP?

Another entitled prick who tantrums when his bangmaid wife appliance breaks down.

If he does this when you have flu, how will he behave if you have cancer?

Get rid of him and build a real support network.

Jesus, how many of these threads are we getting a day? I just commented on one yesterday, almost the exact same story, so please know you’re not alone, @Wheezybreezy . Please check out what everyone said on the other thread, because I think almost all of it is applicable here:
www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5461923-dh-being-awful-when-im-not-well?page=1

When you get well, dump his ass. Life is too short and this is abuse. I’m not joking. It’s not okay. If he acts like this now, what if you had cancer? It’s not going to end well. Dump this loser and find someone who treats you like gold.

So you have much older children then? Any still at home that can pick you up food and be useful?

get him to move out, being on your own is better than this

You are worth more than this and you know it.
Get your strength back, disengage, distance yourself, go out and do stuff without him and start making plans to split.

Thankfully I have everything sorted for the dc for Christmas.

DC are 11 and 16 and have been staying with their DF my ex-p as I have been in hospital.

Well they never start like this. OP’s partner was probably lovely to her at the start…and indeed for years afterwards.

@TwistedWonder judgy much? I don’t think the implication that OP is somehow to blame for her kids being in this situation is helping anyone.

she knows his behaviour is wrong and is asking for advice and support - why not offer that instead of judgement?

This man is a future danger to your life. I’m sorry you have wasted ten years with him, please don’t waste any more time.

Where are these dicks coming from this week. You are the second woman to post something like this, this week. Honestly OP he needs to go. Get better soon.

How can you be helped into leaving your abuser?.

He doesn’t like you. Please do your life a favour and get rid of this bastard.

OP you deserve so much more than this. Ask yourself does he love and care about you? His actions say that he doesn’t.

I am really hoping that you are in a property which is solely in your name and you can give him his marching orders a.s.a.p.
This man's callous lack of concern for you is dangerous.

Raise the bar. Dump this man. You will be much better off on your own.