When’s the right time to live together?

[Power26]

I’m in my 20s, career focused, earn a decent salary and own my own house.

Have been dating someone the same age as me for the last 6 months or so. He lives with his parents, earns a bit less than I do and we met through a previous employer (don’t work together any more).

I feel pressured to live together, more so because that seems to be the done thing for our peers. He’s really keen & feels it’s the next logical step. But I’m not really sure how to approach finances or if I even really want to live with him. We’ve been on holiday together and he has stayed over but it falls on me to do everything/sort everything and he’s quite messy at times. He’s tends to want to come over a lot to get some relief from his parents and quite frankly, I actually like having some space away from him as he’s here most days!

I would say that he’s the only person I’ve properly dated and things feel to be moving a bit quick for my liking. I don’t know what exactly I want from a partner right now but ultimately I think I’d be happier to live separately for a bit longer as it seems like such a big commitment.

Don't do it!! What do they say about a man who needs a place to live will fall in love very fast.

I suggest about a year or two after he's lived on his own would be fast enough. Pish back on him staying so much or say "sure come over Friday but dinner is on him and it's his turn to host in your house". Let him step up.

OP, Straight away what stood out to me in your post is that you "feel pressured" to live together. If you truly wanted to live with him you wouldn't have that feeling. Also he's messy , leaves everything to you etc.. those are red flags you should pay attention to.
Find someone better, he's not the one.

For most people, finances are as big a driver of cohabitation as romance! You don’t need his money in order to house yourself, keep your home to yourself.

Never live with a man who hasn’t lived independently and done all his own cooking, cleaning and organising for at least a few years.

And don’t let him move himself in - tell him that he can’t be at your house ever day, can’t leave half his belongings, and certainly can’t expect to be waited on hand and foot in your home.

No, don’t do it. You feel rushed and pressured.

When/if you move in with someone it should feel exciting because you’re looking forward to taking this next step together.

Yeah, right, no one falls in love as fast as a man who's had enough of his parents but still wants someone to cook and clean for him.

I don’t understand why you’re being so passive. If you think it’s moving too fast, slow it right down. If you don’t want to move in together, don’t. If you feel pressured, speak up and stop it. If hes messy, tell him to tidy up. If you don’t want him in your house daily, tell him you need some space.

So true, been there and got the T shirt. Soon got rid of the entitled arrogant dipshit though once he showed his true colours which was thankfully very quick.