Moral support needed

[Heriam]

Hello,

I posted a while back about a situationship that was having a negative impact on my mental health.

I’ve since changed my phone number. I’m feeling a little weak tonight, like tempted to call him.

Last time, I found it super useful when users said things such as ‘CHOP YOUR FINGERS OFF. DO NOT TEXT HIM.’

i need that type of straight talk right now 😪

Yeh don't. You'll regret it in stronger moments. Has some ice cream. Or a bath. Or something where you can't touch your phone?

You need candy crush

Relive the negative feelings.

Put on giant mittens and tape them shut till the urge passes. Whatever you do, stay away from this person! You’ll feel so good for staying strong and you’ll me happy if you did it with all or most fingers in tact. How long have you managed to go this time without texting? It’s worth counting the time, to make this measurable.

Seriously. Don't do it.
Don't have a glass of wine or something, because that might lower your inhibition and you might be more tempted to send him a message.
Do something nice for yourself, something you'll enjoy, put on a movie that you want to watch, busy yourself with a craft that you love, pick up a thousand piece jigsaw puzzle and get to work.
Anything but don't send him a message.
If it helps, relive the bad times with him.
Write down all the terrible things that he said to you, or did to you, and then say it out loud like you're telling a friend.
You'll realize it when you hear yourself saying it out loud.
It's different than when it's rolling around inside your head.
When you say the words out loud like you're telling someone else, you'll say "what the heck am I thinking?!?"
Strength. You got this. Stay away. He bad man.

I hope you managed to stop yourself. This never helps.
I was always the one to text my ex when he behaved badly as he had no ability to resolve any conflict. I’ve not text for nearly a year now and my life has been calm and happy. Keep up the no contact, you’ll be pleased you did. Don’t let a man who only wants a situationship pretend he’s worth your time.

How you doing today, OP?

Hopefully you’re being strong and not reaching out to your ex. It’s super tempting at times. You’ll have times when you feel lonely and miss them. But they’re your ex for a reason. Don’t reach back.

Google 'Talking Therapies' in your area. You need to boost your self belief and resilience.

There are no problems with texting him. Text him if you wish.

Thank you all! And sorry for the late response. You’ll be pleased to know that I didn’t do it!!

The temptation is back!!!

You're just setting yourself back to 2 weeks ago if you text him now. Cold turkey is absolutely the only way to go. I Had a horrible breakup of a fairly short (1 year) situationship 5 years ago. I felt utterly bereft, even while my brain was telling me whilst this broken man was in my life I had no room for a good man. Read the book "It's called a Breakup because it's Broken" and it stopped me from reaching back out to him. FWIW I met someone else a few months later and wow, all I can say is I'm so glad I didn't fall back into bad habits with Mr Wrong, it left the door open for Mr Right to walk in. Literally, he came to plaster my bedroom.😂

It’s been one month today since I changed my number! I’m feeling down today so thinking about him a lot

I’m glad you found your Mr Right

Why do you still have his number?

Delete it. I PROMISE you’ll feel better once you’ve done it.

Nothing good will come from ringing him. Don’t drink poison just because you’re thirsty x

A month is still early days and this time of year is particularly difficult, but at least you can go into 2026 with a fresh start and all the opportunities it will bring and leave him behind in 2025.

Remember there will always be seductive things about people and connections you have - acknowledge that

now imagine the relationship in the cold light of day - would you want it how it was?

do you still
wnat to phone 📞

Ouchhhh, ‘Don’t drink poison just because you’re thirsty.’ I haven’t heard that one before! 😅😅

Leaving him in 2025 sounds like a good idea. I didn’t think of it like that x

It’s true that we on some level miss everyone that we leave behind. That doesn’t mean we should leave them in the past I guess!

Shouldn’t*