I need advice, my husband is driving me nuts. So much so that I think we need to seperate. I have just had the toughest year of my life going through breast cancer. I have had a mastectomy and have been given the all clear. Did it with two smallies. Every Friday was treatment day, my husbands work was great to let him take the day off, he told them that it was to look after me and the boys, he never had to bring me for treatment, I always organised a spin, when I’d be gone he would get his mum to take the boys for the day so he had the day to himself. His mum is great, she would be our go to for babysitting, but it meant I felt I never wanted to take the piss and ask her to take them on a day after treatment when I really needed it. Only a very few times I asked her to take them. He has smoked weed constantly for the last 6 years I mean like the minute he got up he’d have a spliff, I am not ok with this and he knows it. We have had many an argument over it not only because of the amount of money wasted but on his mental health as well.
This last week has just been the worst, he has been unwell with the flu. He is the worst patient I have ever met in my life the moaning the shouting and the cursing. He kindly passed it on of course to the rest of us. It annoys me so much because I went through 5 months of chemo and I didn’t complain as much as him.
Now 2 weeks ago he gave up smoking weed, 3 days ago cigarettes. This morning because he has the flu he was unable to walk shouting and roaring the house down. Had us all awake at 6 am.
i got the two boys up and we went to the sitting room. The next thing he goes I am getting up I won’t have it said that I got ye out of bed. Then all we
could hear is a massive roar and our child play piano being banged off the floor. I was so furious with this behaviour I pushed him back down to the bedroom and told him to cop on he was scaring the boys. He then told me that it’s oblivious that I don’t love him because I have no sympathy for him in pain.
im sorry like but Jesus if he wasn’t as rude as he is when he is sick I would be the doting wife but I am no one’s punching bag. I have been with him for 25 years and I am just getting so fed up with his behaviour. I think it’s him that doesn’t live me if I’m being honest. I’m only 43 I’m letting my hair grow back grey because I like it, it’s still short enough but it’s growing. I have no interest in sex yet because I’m looking after a 6 year old and a 2 year old literally from half 6 in the morning until half 5 everyday on my own. For my husband the to come back home to a lovely cooked meal and for him then go out to the garage to smoke his brains out all evening. I put the boys to bed too. I just don’t have anymore energy to be dealing g with his shit anymore. Should I leave or give it some time and see how it pans out when he quits smoking
so sorry for this long vent I just need advice. Oh one last thing I have I. The past asked even begged him to go to couples counselling and he refused
please help me