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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I need to move on, don't I?

7 replies

OnceMoreIntoTheBreachDearFriends · 30/11/2025 15:55

Until earlier this year I'd had a friend with benefits situation with someone I'd known for a long time (but sleeping together for about three years) - it all worked pretty fine for me but I knew he wanted more and over the summer I thought why not...

Big mistake! We might be good as friends but we are a disaster as a couple - too many reasons to go into but I admit I'm far from perfect either - not blaming him totally or me totally but we were just completely not compatible when trying to have a proper relationship.

The last time I saw him was when I dropped him home after a disastrous week abroad which really was the final nail in the coffin. I had paid for the holiday with the agreement he'd pay me in weekly instalments - which continued when we got back. However - one week he didn't pay and I got in touch to ask when I'd get the money and we ended up having a bit of an argument after which he blocked me EVERYWHERE.

The thing is though, I miss him as a friend. I would be happy to go back to how we were, but I get we might not be able to (HRT has finally proved effective too and not going to lie I have a good sex drive for the first time in years!). But I just wish I could get in touch with him and find out...

Any ideas? Or do I just need to move on...

OP posts:
TFImBackIn · 30/11/2025 15:56

How much does he still owe you?

TwistedWonder · 30/11/2025 16:01

Why on earth would you want to be friends worn a man who owes you money and has blocked you rather than have an adult conversation?

littleburn · 30/11/2025 16:04

Draw a line under this. Small claims court for what he owes you, as you have no way of getting in touch with him. It’s all online and very straightforward.

OnceMoreIntoTheBreachDearFriends · 30/11/2025 16:10

TFImBackIn · 30/11/2025 15:56

How much does he still owe you?

A couple of hundred, he has started paying again since this

@littleburn @TwistedWonder He's still paying me the money, was just late paying it the week we had the argument

OP posts:
nopiesleftinthisvehicle · 30/11/2025 16:10

Are you putting the fact that this charmer owes you a considerable sum of money - seemingly has no intention of paying you because he's blocked you everywhere - completely out of your mind? 🤔

OnceMoreIntoTheBreachDearFriends · 30/11/2025 16:19

nopiesleftinthisvehicle · 30/11/2025 16:10

Are you putting the fact that this charmer owes you a considerable sum of money - seemingly has no intention of paying you because he's blocked you everywhere - completely out of your mind? 🤔

Please see my update - he has been paying

OP posts:
outerspacepotato · 30/11/2025 16:30

Friends don't block you when you ask them to pay the money they owe you.

He's mad and he was ready to screw you out of money because things didn't work out how he wanted.

No. Things have changed and you can't go backwards. This is a no brainer. Leave it behind you.

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