my husband and i got married in
early 2024. we were in a 2 year long distance relationship. a month after wr got married i got a job in my hometown and this was a 3 year contract potentially extended to 5 if we had children. i told my husband from the second date that life with me was not going to be easy as i needed to do my training and could not guarantee where i was going to live. he initially agreed to support me and said wed get through anythijg because he loved me.
in october 2024 we reserved a house and he asked me to put my half of the holding deposit down but never put his half in and that caused a big argument and when i texted my mum about this she said just get hum to put the rest of the money down for the housr and if he acts up kick him out. This was not a gfrat rrsponse but my husband got my phonr went thrlugh my messages and saw these and villified me fkr the next 11 months saying me and ny mum plotted to get his money off him.
In december 2024 the day before legal completion of the house he tried to pull out of the sale as he wanted assurances that in 3 years time we will move back to his city. he then put the majority of the mlney down for the deposit about 80% of it. we moved in the house in january 2025 and he only moved in with a backpsck and left the rest of his stuff in his hometown. we lived togetjer for 3 months and it was diffocult - we had lots of arguments about money and he wouldnt let me sleep at night before work. he lived on thr house half a week for 10 weeks beflre giving up and telling me he wanted a dkvlrce in late april 2025.
we didnt speak for 6 wreks in may 2025 and then between june to november he was coming fown to the marital home intermittently saying he wanted it to work and half didnt. in november we moved back in and said we would give it a month but we lasted 2 weeks because the old issues resurgaced - hed keep me up at night before work, call me names, get angry and would go to his city when angry without resolving conflict, he would expect me to be out with him every evening when i came home from work and of not hed just drive my car around the city but not fill the petrol tank up or complain about fillin petrol tank up. Hed expect me out on the weekends when i wanted to rest and wouldnt really help woth household chores - id ask for help then be told im controlling. It was really difficult and this lasted 2 weeks.
He earned 3x my wage but in september pulled the direct debit and expects me to do 50% of the mortgage and bills each month which is putting me under massive financial strain.
yesterday he told me again he doesmt think the marriage will work and we should go our separate ways and he siad his life job career gym family and frienfs are all in his city but at the same time he trlls me he has handed his notice in at work and im not sure i belive him. Whenevwr he gets lonely he will syart calling me and then coming back to tje marital home.
he pressured me into filing for divorce i spetmber 2025 bevause he withdrew the mlrtgage dorect debit but i never wanted the divorce and was happy to retract the papers. I dont know how im going to get kver him. He was the love of my life and man id planned my whole life with and i have no idea what do.
Im honestly scared ill be on my own flrever and not be a mum after all of this and spend my life hearrbroken pining after him.jnable to move on.evwry single thing reminds me of him. I feel like i cant go to tje supermarket or walk around town wothour thinking of hom and dont know how to mkve on woth my life qhen it has been so entangled woth someone else who is not there anymore. Im nlt lookkng forward to xhristmas eotber as all tje traditions have been thrpwn out the qindow and am dreading it all.