DW brings ex bf home

[ellz3000]

dw brings ex bf home to where Im feeling uncomfortable. He just pops in out of the blue. I had a chat with her and she says there good friends but she’s been on many spa dates / meetings
an i being paranoid?

You're being a doormat. I don't mean this in a bad way, but you either "grow a pair" or maybe offer them the master bedroom.

Ok I say this as someone who is actually very good friends with one of my ex boyfriends, if you're unhappy with something and she's brushing you off, that is a major problem. Friendships with exes require absolutely titanium solid boundaries and the main priority always needs to be the relationship with your partner not the relationship with the ex.

Also I've never been on a spa date with my ex. That crosses one of those titanium boundaries.

😂 sorry but this!
In what world do you think this is acceptable from your DW?!?

Do they share children?

Would it mean they had to go on spa dates if they did share children?

Why not? It’s great to have a friendship/positive relationship if you co parent. You do realise not every ex couple hates eachother 😂

They do not have children

An ex gf of mine has been over to mine a couple of times.

She and DW then go and compare notes.............

Have you told her your not comfortable with the amount of time they spend alone together?

Are you in an open marriage?

Have you communicated that you don’t like it? Are you an insecure person?

Are they inappropriate or just friends? I mean she is with you and if she wanted to be with him I’m sure she would just go with him.. I feel like you haven’t given enough context just said her ex is always coming round

When I first met my wife, she was in the “friends with ex” zone. Didn’t bother me to start with but over time it became very apparent why they split up and there really was no friendship there. It went on for some time but I really didn’t like the ex, and it was becoming quite uncomfortable. The ex also wanted to pop into our home and have weekends away etc. Not something I would have tolerated, but my wife made the decision to end contact. It really was more draining than anything. I think it’s been almost 20 years since we saw or heard from the ex, but had it continued I would have walked away.

Er....no. Just wouldn't tolerate this.