I’m on edge all the time reading her mood, trying to think if I’ve upset her, checking my behaviour to make sure I’ve not done something wrong. And knowing that when she starts being ‘off’ with me I can start dreading a fall out that is probably on the way.
Other times she is positive, loving, on the surface from anyone looking in she is a supportive and loving mum. If I brought this up with her she would say she loves me and just wants us to be close and she doesn’t know why we’re not.
I’m jealous when I see posts about women being close with their mums, and they just seem at ease with their mums. I don’t know if I’ve pushed her away and caused the problems by being selfish and difficult. How do I know.