Can’t help but think there is no one out there for me

[WhatCanISayYoureWelcome]

I would like to start dating again but I just can’t imagine there is anyone out there for me? Has anyone ever felt this way and met someone? Or not. Or is there a normal way to feel?

Normal

There isn't anyone out there for you.

There's loads of people out there and you might like one of them enough to prefer being with them to being alone. But that's it. There's no special someone that you have to find.

That's pretty much it.

Oh no I don’t mean I soulmate or anything I just genuinely can’t imagine finding someone to date. I rarely find men attractive out and about, ive fancied one person in 10 years

Im mid 50s, widowed, with what I thought was a lot of baggage. Reading MN, it’s easy to get the viewpoint that mid 50s is the absolute doldrums for dating. But for me, I met a lovely man through my hobby (he’s also widowed) and I’m loving all the time I spend with him. We’re very compatible. Don’t give up hope OP

What age are you if you don't mind saying.

Oh that’s really nice to hear glad to hear you met someone

37

You re young, you have plenty of time, but I know what you mean about not fancying anyone.

I don’t think I’m that “young” not anymore anyway 🤣 I am losing hope only one man I found attractive in the last 10 years was married.

I get it OP. I’m much older than you (mid 50s) and have only found a few men in my life attractive enough that I’ve wanted to date them. And in my age group there are none at all. I gave up about 10 years ago.

But when I was your age I did meet someone and we dated a few years. I think a lot of men around that age are still quite attractive. So I think you still Have time to meet someone but you will have to some effort into it. I never meet anyone in real life, so I really spent time on the dating apps and being vigilant about it.

Don't give up. My friend who is nearly 60 is absolutely giddy in love with a lovely man she met through a hobby group after being alone for ten years after a horrible divorce from her cheating ex.

I thought this way myself. I went to the move to find a girl, i went out places with alot of women and got many numbers. I couldnt make it work. But i believe there is someone out there for everyone. We should keep searching if that is what we want. The right person will come along in time.

I feel exactly the same. I’m 48.

There may or may not be someone out there for you, but instead of focusing on finding someone, why not focus on falling in love with yourself... What are the qualities (other than looks) that you value in a partner? And do you have these qualities yourself? If not, think about how you can cultivate these and become the person you are looking for.

Once we become 'The One' for ourselves, we naturally attract people who are suited to us, and we refuse to settle for anything less than we deserve.

And remember, you may not find someone physically attractive at first, but when you find someone who's qualities match your own, their inner beauty will shine through and they'll become the most attractive person in the world to you!

Wishing you all the best.