End of long term relationship

[LemonandLimegin]

Been together over 8 years, partner has dropped in me all of a sudden that he isn't happy in the relationship anymore and that he wants to be single. He's done this before about 5 years ago. We had some space and decided to give it a go and we moved in together.

Everything has been great. Up until year ago where we have got stuck. He works long hours and I also work full time. Admittedly I would say I'm tired to do things. He also feel we've outgrown eachother and that were more like best friends. I said can't we work at this and see if things improve. He is not wanting this and wants to be single. It feels like such a shock. I can't believe this is happening 😢

I'm sorry OP, that must be very hard. It takes time for you to come to terms with the end of a relationship, when you are not the person instigating the split. Give yourself time and get support from family and friends.

Try and look at it this way - you don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be in a relationship with you. You have the rest of your life to live and there is endless possibility for adventures, travel, wonderful times with friends and new relationships. It's of course normal to be sad and grieve the end of your relationship but please don't forget that life is full of opportunities and possibilities and you will feel happy again in the not too distant future 💐

It is tough when a relationship comes to an end, especially when it wasn’t your choice. But it’s even tougher being in a relationship where you are just waiting for your partner to have the next wobble, that is not a secure and happy relationship. Let him go and free yourself up for something better.

He has said hes felt like this for a while. Its such a shock. Eight years feels like such a long tine to give up on a relationship.

Sorry you’re in this position, OP. It must be very shocking. Even very long relationships can end (my parents got divorced after 32 years of marriage).

The fact that he wants to leave after 8 years without warning and without attempting to fix it does make it sound like, in his mind, it is completely over. It may be that someone else has caught his interest which may also increase his certainty on this move, although he may just know in himself that it’s over for him.

That is very shocking and painful for you. Do you have people you can talk to in real life?

I have a good support network and friends that I have spoke to have said maybe their might be someone else. We live together. He's not been horrible to me. Hes also had stress at work which I dont know whether that's affected him. He said its hard but hes just not happy.

Its a bad idea to take space when the relationship is going south, people tend to look elsewhere and invest in other people when there is a break ftrom contact and connection.