Wasn’t sure where to post this as property/relationship related

[Shakeyitoff]

I have remarried. This one’s a keeper. My DH sold his house earlier this year. He hasn’t anything to financially show for it other than less debt incurred by buying it. It’s a massive relief to finances.

My question is regarding the home we live in. I have children from my previous relationship, no kids will be happening for us. He has none of his own. The house is in my name. I guess I’m after thoughts on the fairness of shared interests in the house for all of us. At the moment our will specifies that he has life time residency rights - albeit held in trust for the kids if I died before him. He’s able to sell it and move elsewhere with those funds but has no rights to the value as things stand. I trust him implicitly but not an unknown other person who he might move on with.

DH contributes income to the house and works hard on maintenance. Basically one pot with individual spends. I am thinking of a tenants in common type scenario with a portion of the house being his. I have no reason to think we will ever divorce but I know he’d leave himself short rather than me and the kids if it ever did happen and walk away with nothing. Generous to a fault and I want to protect him from himself I suppose, especially now he has no property of his own. I would want something smaller if that ever did happen and wouldn’t want to remain here anyway on my own, although I could just about afford to do so. He has a great relationship with the kids. DH is a named guardian. He has no kids of his own to house.

probably too much info. I have a relatively small mortgage with about 1/4 of mortgage to value ratio at the time I took over the mortgage and bought my ex out. As the divorce took so long we DH and I were already living together by the time it was all settled.

i guess I was thinking along the lines of 1/3 his (as his work on the house has definitely increased its value), 2/3 me as I’d like to think we could all house ourselves with that. Me something smaller and cheaper to run for the kids and I. Him, a small house or flat on his own. Bit morbid thinking of divorce/death but want to be fair if it ever did happen. Thoughts on a postcard.

Congratulations on the fantastic partner. The truth is he will want his own children in time, if its possible.

He won’t. The discussion was had and he was clear on his stance. Happy with what we have.

If you're married isn't it half his now or are you sorting a pre nip?

Depends what country you are in. If you are married, I,d be surprised if he didnt want to be a joint tenant

Are you in england or wales?

Was the will made before or after you married? If it was before, then it's void now.

I can't imagine him paying towards your marital home.And then leaving with nothing to leave it all to your children.

I have no reason to think we will ever divorce but I know he’d leave himself short rather than me and the kids if it ever did happen and walk away with nothing.

Oh you sweet summer child. I ve seen the most loving and reasonable partner completely turn when there's a divorce or break up on the cards. I wouldn't be too sure of that.

People get nasty in a divorce / breakup.

Honestly, I don’t think it’s morbid at all — it’s really smart that you’re thinking about this now. You sound super fair-minded and caring, which is such a good combo when you’ve both got history, kids, and a home involved. ❤️
You’ve already set things up so your husband’s looked after if something happens, but your kids are protected too — that’s actually better planning than most people manage! It totally makes sense that you’d want to give him some sort of share, especially since he’s contributing to the house and putting in work to keep it nice. You’re not trying to cut him out; you’re just trying to be sensible and make sure everyone’s okay, whatever happens down the line.
Doing something like a tenants in common setup could work well — that way, he officially owns a percentage (say one-third), and you keep the rest in your name. You can both make sure your wills say exactly what happens to your share if one of you passes away. It keeps everything fair and clear, and nobody’s left guessing later.
It’s definitely worth having a quick chat with a solicitor who knows about family/estate planning. They can help you sort out what’s best legally — maybe tweak your will or set up a declaration of trust so it’s all in writing and protected properly. It doesn’t have to change the way you live day-to-day, it just means you’re both covered and your wishes are respected.
Bottom line: your 1/3–2/3 idea sounds totally reasonable. It shows you care about him, but also that you’re thinking about your kids’ future. Honestly, it’s the most loving and sensible thing you could do.

You’re typing with your rose tinted glasses on love- never do people change than they do in divorce! Protect yourself and your children.

So, he brought nothing to the table other than his labour? I assume you've not been charging him rent, so fair do's.
Leave it all to your children. Do not be foiled by 'love'. This is not your first rodeo. Protect your DC's future, they need it more.

I made a will in anticipation of marriage (my solicitor’s term, I guess it’s a Legal Thing). My property passes to my dc but my H is allowed to live there until she’s 18, and will maintain it and its value. He also benefits from a lump sum from my life insurance.

If he comes into any money later we’ll probably buy something together and our wills will probably both benefit my dc, as he doesn’t and won’t have any.

You need legal advice

Yes, this.
Plus, marriage invalidates a will so depending on timing, and whether it was written specifically with the marriage organised, you may currently be without a will. In which case the house will be inherited by DH.

Surely all your assets are jointly owned now you’re married. Whatever it says tenant wise, he’d own half of it for divorce/estate purposes as long as the marriage wasn’t too short.

you are married so regardless of who’s name the house is in, it’s now a marital asset. I would seek legal advice and draw up a mirror will with both you and DH following guidance, of course, a will won’t matter if you unfortunately ever did divorce. There is a family law solicitor on Instagram called The Legal Queen, she does lots of videos on divorce and how courts split assets.

What an odd thing to say.
Have you never encountered people who are childfree by choice?

OP, as much as I understand, I do think it's wise to leave your house to your children.
Your husband has had his entire adult life to figure out his finances and to start building wealth. The fact that he hasn't, as sad as that may be, is not your responsibility. As much as you love him, your children shouldn't lose out because you want to be charitable.
Your husband has the advantage of living rent-free in your home. He could be using whatever he saves on rent or mortgage to build his own wealth. You don't have to do that for him.
My husband is about to receive a rather large inheritance. With it, he will pay of the remaining mortgage (still 65% left to be paid off), which is great for both of us. I get to live mortgage free, but I will have no claims on that money - nor do I expect it. In case of his death or divorce, it will belong to our children. In the mean time I will be using whatever I save on mortgage costs to invest in my own retirement fund.

If your kids own it, but he gets to live there for his lifetime, who pays the taxes and maintenance? Are there penalties that your kids would have to pay by owning multiple properties even though not actually having the use of where your husband is?

You need to see a lawyer.

Thank you for your replies. I know he would walk away with nothing, because he has done so before. He acted with kindness throughout his divorce (we met part way through it) and felt horribly guilty about it whilst knowing he had to leave for his own wellbeing. Honestly he is a good egg, incredibly loyal and not financially driven at all. His default setting is others first, himself last.

His trust and generosity have been abused in the past and I don’t want to put him in a position where it happens again by me. Equally, if I died I don’t want a potential next spouse to diddle him and divert funds from ‘our’ kids because I can see it would be possible to play him.

We made the current will post marriage. I do intend to approach the solicitor again to sort it all out formally. Just wanted people’s thoughts on whether I was being fair to all regarding the split, before I approached the solicitor again.

He does contribute to the house both financially and practically. It all goes in to one pot pretty much. He is not asking for me to do this. I am offering because I think it’s fair to acknowledge all he does for us as a family financially and practically. For him to view this as ‘his’ house too and that he isn’t here or viewed as a cocklodger, as he is far from it.

I think you'd be crazy to leave your house to anyone but your children tbh.

If I ever get remarried, my kids will inherit everything.

It’s still a short marriage and I have children to house. The house would unlikely be split 50:50 in the event of divorce. Not at this stage while they’re still dependent.

Could you not just leave things as they are and then if you one day divorce, you can release some equity to him to purchase his own property? Or as he is essentially mortgage free, he could be saving a huge chunk of his income and eventually buy his own property as an investment?

Could he afford to pay off the mortgage and then you could change things so he owns 1/4 to your 3/4 as tenants in common? Then he has truly made a proper financial investment in the home.

That said, if he has the right to live in the property for life, and has no children to pass anything on to, surely what he really needs is a home for the rest of his life. And you’re providing that. Who owns the property is neither here nor there except for inheritance purposes. Your dc would then fully inherit when you both die.