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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Feelings for 2 brothers - anyone ever been in this situation?

10 replies

GorillaPie · 27/10/2025 20:36

Many years ago I was dating a guy for a few years. He was a lovely guy but I struggled to feel wholly attracted to him and several months into the relationship I met his brother, who was very different in looks and personality. I hit it off with the brother as we had loads in common and almost immediately developed a crush on him. The feelings for his brother became really strong and I did everything I could to kill them, but it never went away entirely. I felt awful and really guilty about it but whenever I interacted with the brother, my feelings would reignite. We'd often chat a lot and hang out but obviously nothing ever happened.

I never told my boyfriend at the time and obviously never told his brother. I don't know if either of them suspected something and unsurprisingly, the relationship eventually ended. It's not something I can ever tell anyone in real life so I'm wondering if anyone has ever been in this position? It's popped back into my head recently because it's the plot of a popular TV series and I was inclined to dismiss the whole thing as nonsense that would never happen, but having been in a similar position I guess I can't say that! My only defence is that I was quite young at the time but it might happen at any age, I don't know.

OP posts:
ayvasili · 28/10/2025 04:54

Are you Elena?

RyanFudgingMurphy · 28/10/2025 05:10

The summer I turned petty? My Life With the Walter Boys?

I’m middle aged and love a cheesy teen romance.

GorillaPie · 28/10/2025 06:56

Hah, those shows have definitely made me think of it. But this was my real life situation! So I wondered if it ever happened to anyone else. It's not the kind of thing I'd ever admit to in real life.

OP posts:
Irenesortof · 28/10/2025 06:57

It happened on the Archers to Will and Ed Grundy! Seriously I should think something along those lines happens fairly often if someone has a partner they are not that keen on sexually.

CheeseWisely · 28/10/2025 07:00

I’d imagine it happens quite often. DH’s brother is very similar in looks and personality to DH and I fancy DH so I can see how it could evolve.

Realrobin · 28/10/2025 07:03

Yes I've had this a couple of times. I don't think it's unusual!

dimension2025 · 28/10/2025 07:49

Hi Belly 😂

trailblazer42 · 28/10/2025 08:20

Yes…I had a complete soap opera situation! Sounds made up but genuinely happened.

I had a massive crush on a guy when I was in sixth form but it didn’t go anywhere, then I met his brother a couple of years later. We dated for a little while but I was much more into him than he was me. I then started dating a friend of them both who had actually dated their sister! This man I dated (who I eventually married, now STBEX) was actually bisexual and I ended up in a sexual relationship with him and sometimes together with the first brother for a while…it was a little messy for a time. I still had huge feelings for the second brother which took me years to get over.

We always joked that the gene pool was particularly strong…then ridiculously 25 yrs later our daughter started dating the son of the sister (they were only 16 and it didn’t last!).

GorillaPie · 28/10/2025 08:30

Realrobin · 28/10/2025 07:03

Yes I've had this a couple of times. I don't think it's unusual!

You've had feelings for 2 different sets of brothers? I thought I was bad for just one 😆

OP posts:
GorillaPie · 28/10/2025 08:31

dimension2025 · 28/10/2025 07:49

Hi Belly 😂

To be fair, I never had relationships with 2 brothers and almost married one - in that regard, Belly is far worse than me!

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