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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I don't care about my ex.

4 replies

mrsneville · 22/10/2025 11:38

How do I tell my DSister I literally do not care about my ex, his life, his new wife, etc?

We broke up about 8 years ago and he still lives in the same small village as my DS.

It was an amicable break up. We have both since moved on and both got married, but on reflection he did have some quite worrying behaviours and I don't particularly like him nor think he is a good person.

The problem is my sister is still weirdly invested in his life and situation, and sort of knows his new wife (village life). She tells me every time she sees him out and about. She tells me every tidbit of gossip she has about him or his new wife.

I try and act nonchalant about it but I don't know how to explain to her that I literally do not care about hearing about him - in fact, I actively do not want to know. Not for any reason other than I have moved on with my life and I don't care about what he is doing or whether or not he has got a new puppy/raincoat/pizza oven.

How do I explain to her that I don't want her to tell me anything without seeming like I haven't 'got over it'?

help!

OP posts:
Coffeeishot · 22/10/2025 11:42

Just say Sister i do no care why do you think im interested in them? She probably thinks you want a good gossip and she is on "your side" just be straight with her.

mrsneville · 22/10/2025 11:49

Coffeeishot · 22/10/2025 11:42

Just say Sister i do no care why do you think im interested in them? She probably thinks you want a good gossip and she is on "your side" just be straight with her.

Thanks, I agree I think she just wants a gossip. I just don't find it a fun gossip topic I guess. 😂

OP posts:
Coffeeishot · 22/10/2025 11:55

Just tell her you are not bothered about them. Or turn it on her saying you are awfully interested in them 😀

Brightbluesomething · 22/10/2025 13:04

I understand how frustrating this is. I have a ‘friend’ who keeps asking me if I’ve seen my ex whenever we meet up. Then volunteers information I don’t want to know. So I know he’s been dating a mum from school as they were talking about me during a play date with their respective DC’s. And the new GF thinks I’m ‘nice’, perhaps despite what he’s told her.
I’ve made it clear I’m not interested yet I still have to say this every time. She doesn’t get the message and lives for gossip which is why I’m actively distancing myself from her. I just don’t want to hear it.

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