Hi everyone.
Very long story, ill Try my best to shorten it.
I was with my daughters dad for 6 yesrs and we have a 4 year old.
For all her life he has worked away, even when he was at home, i did most.
I can remember the newborn stage, he was at home for 2 weeks but was constantly playing his computer at night time and laying in, in the morning, to the point i didnt want to be a mom anymore as I was so scared and lonely as my pregnant and recovering was bad and I felt like he was supportive.
Its always been the same, I do all the nursery runs, drs appointment, school applications, bath time, cut her nails, etc...he works away. He earns good money but, never has any momey due to a gamberling problem which he says he is over now. So basically, he works away to only benefit himself.
He got drunk one night (my sisters baby shower- how embarrassing for me)
He put his hands on me and neglected our daughter (it left the party to pack up at home - this all happened when I left, he came home, i was told what happened, he got angry and put his hands on me.- i phoned police)
He was apologetic and said he had a gamberling problem, that was in February (2024) by that December, he was gamberling again - 10k of mine stolen)
Again, promised he was going to change , said im the one discarding him and breaking the family up over an addiction when I should support him etc.... Stuck by him, i got therapy and so did he.
I dont think he was ever serious about stopping as he never handed his finances over to me and yet again, had no money.
I asked him to leave the other week and I found out again, he opened a band accoint behind my back and he denied it... they evidence was there...
Been 2 months now, we only have contacrwhen it comes to our child.
BUT, im starting to think he has narcissist traits, and I know you cant co parent with a narc from heating other people's stories.
*says he never shouted at me (he didnt) and said so putting his hands on me once was an accident.
*says he has it hard working away And I have it easy - if he past his test he wouldnt have to work away but hes never bothered?
*thinks its acceptable for a man whos on £900 a week (37y.0) to move back in with his mom and get back on his feet - says ive got the best life being at home with my daughter even though I work and single mom)
*picks when he works weekends without asking me if that's OK
*telling me hes saving money now and will haveappointment soon (we rent because he never could save) and hes telling me how much money hes got already to buy but he refuses to give me the money back he stole from me.
*I told him ive had a huge car bill and need my money back as im struggling, he said tough, he needs the money to pass his test and buy himself a car and hes glad im suffering as now I know how he felt.
*He told.him his mom was poorly who should be watching our kid when I work today, I asked if my sister should have her then and he said because I never asked how his mom was, I dont care.... my mom has just have a hip op which he knows about and hasnt asked about her once 🤦♀️
he said me discarding him (his words) makes me a bad person. I honestly feel like im being abused, I feel like im partly to blame.
Is this narcissist behavior?
I feel like im going crazy.
Sorry about spelling- it rushed this before work, thank you for reading x