Not had sex for 15 years now

[Newstarthelp]

My husband could not perform so it was okay but now single 3 years and want to venture but scared. I need sex to make me know I function again toys don’t work have I gone too long

Get out there op hook up sites adult holidays etc.
Have some fun.
I live my life with no strings attached.

By “function again” and “toys don’t work” do you mean you’re not able to orgasm? Have you ever been able to orgasm, alone or with a partner? If so, it’s worth visiting your GP - new anorgasmia can be caused by hormonal imbalances, underlying health conditions, medications (do you take SSRIs?), or can be psychological.

You don’t state whether you’re looking to date, or just looking for more casual sex; you’ll find both on dating sites, although having good self esteem is crucial, and having sex with near-strangers can be a bit disappointing if they’re not invested in your pleasure - so don’t use that as an outlet just to try and see if you’re still able to have pleasurable sex, as if you don’t, that could just be your partner’s lack of skill or interest

Try POF and take your time.

Thanks I worry I be so crap
in bed as been so long and can’t orgasm now. Was so in love I just went without any play what so ever . So loyal. Now had odd snog but then pull away just so scared with new men . Someone said just get laid once and I be ok. Letting life pass me by and no guys will want me soon. 66 now. Last time had sex was 50 x

What are hook up adult holiday sites please

It soon comes back with a considerate lover.

You might want a topical oestrogen cream for your parts to stimulate nerve function. There’s a doctor who talks about women’s sexual health on instagram called Dr Nighat Arif and she is very good on this.

I'd be wary of hook ups if you are unable to orgasm to be honest. If you struggle then you will possibly feel quite used and like a piece of meat. I think it may take a lover who is invested in being there with you on this journey instead of having to consistently start again with every single bloke.
I found POF absolutely dire with what options were available.
I think whatever route you want to go down, you need to be very strong in yourself, confident in what it is you want from it and be able to communicate it. And if you find it is having a negative impact more than a positive one then you need to step away.

to be honest I think it’s really difficult for anyone to advise sensibly - we’re all so different. I’m a man in my 60s - for me, I can’t do it or enjoy it properly without some proper emotional connection, so straight hook-ups are a no go for me. If you’re anything similar, it might just leave you feeling worse than before. Dating sites and singles groups are all well and good but - sometimes it feels like a lottery, you never know when you’re going to find that one you feel the right way about. When you do, you’ll know. And if it does feel right, then the rest will probably follow easily enough 😁

Thank you so much. So lonely but your right hopefully if I find an actual interest it may come back

If you feel scared with new men then a one off hook up or ons probably isn’t what you need right now.

Instead what you should be looking for is a FWB who won’t put pressure on you and can gradually help you get your confidence back.