Ex is having a baby

[Haribostarmixx]

Backstory - he left 1.5 years ago when our child was 2, immediately moved in with new woman, sold our house and I moved in with parents. They got engaged 6 months later.

Yesterday I found out he’s having a baby with the woman. How do I stop this taking up so much space in my head? I feel like I haven’t even processed him suddenly leaving and losing all my in laws and my home let alone everything that’s happened since. I was with him for 15 years and never imagined he would replace me like this. He literally doesn’t care.

How do I get over this? I still have to communicate with him for our child.

Oh this must be absolutely awful, and I imagine would open all possibly still unhealed wounds!
Use support you have in real life, but would also recommend journalling but with emphasis on journalling on both the good and bad days so you can see the progress in amongst the pain!
Maybe try to see this as a full stop in the road of your previous life. He has moved on in every way possible, you may as well try to do the same in any way you can.
Look after yourself though, I can't imagine how sad this would make me feel.

It's awful. My exH left me for a receptionist at his work and immediately moved in with her. It was really hard on me and my DD. i did everything i could to hide my feelings from her and for a year I travelled backwards and forwards to ExHs new town with her as she wouldnt stay over! They got married a year later and i was still devastated that I could be replaced and taken out of his life so easily. My advice would be, own your feelings, be sad as it is sad but give yourself strict times in which to be sad (ie for an hour a day and then an hour a week etc) and at no other times. Get some counselling to channel feelings. Build your life up. i joined a church and some other women's groups and did all kinds of things that I had never thought of (i now crochet and go wild swimming!). Do things you couldn't do before. The day me and DD moved into our new house I bought 11 scatter cushions for my bed, because i could! 6 years on I am engaged to someone else and we co parent OK. I spent a lot of time wanting and watching for it to all fall apart for them and it felt unfair, occasionally i still do! But those feelings only hurt you. the best thing is focus, fake it until you make it to live your best life.