Want time to myself

[Mummy289]

I’m going around in circles and I don’t know if it’s me if I need therapy. I have been with hubby 24 years why now is it annoying me. Why now is it to much as his always been like this. His never needed anyone but me.
i keep asking I want to play these social internet games on my own. I want to be me not now as both of us, I want somewhere I’m just me not me and him. However what ever game I go on his there, he won’t play another game. He won’t watch tv any more, he won’t play his PlayStation. His constantly texting me. He follows me around the house. Not in a mean way but his always there.

Block him on your phone.

You need to be more assertive. Blunt.

When he texts you excessively, tell him to stop, he's bothering you. When he follows you around the house, tell him to stop, he's bothering you. When he joined your game, tell him it's bothers you. He's suffocating you and you need to start asserting yourself. You need to spell it out to him. If he sulks, let him.

You are going to upset him, there's no way around that. You need to learn to ok about upsetting people who upset you.

I was you 4yrs ago. Miserable in my relationship but scared to leave because I had asd children and no friends. I was scared of being left on my own. But honestly im 1000 times happier now im single. I know it's hard and the logistics seem impossible but there is always a way.

Thanks guys i have sat down and had a big heart to heart. Last chance. But we will see feel he was more on board this time as rather than being angry he was sad. I was sad too . I have been really assertive with stop texting and gaming .

You need to talk to Women's aid and your GP.
You are in a Coercive relationship which is a real crime.
You are not allowed to use the loo without being hassled by him.

This is a crime.
Not a good kind man.
A controlling, manipulative, coercive one.
Completely suffocating.
You need to involve social services before you have a full mental breakdown.

Tell your GP you feel on the verge of a mental breakdown and who will take your children?
You need help.
Forget anout him.
This isn't love, its control of you.

What you are feeling is absolutely normal.
He's the one who isn't normal.

Not RTFT but, for me, this was never healthy. I would have found this sufficating. You and your husband are 2 separate people, not 1 melded person, and having a degree of space from each other is vital for your own mental health and wellbeing. Because you grew up with a very controlling primary carer, you’ve accepted constraints which would be unacceptable and unbearable for most people. The 40s and 50s are a very interesting time for women and we generally start to want to live for ourselves more rather than just looking after everyone else. It’s at least in part hormonally driven. It’s fabulous. That’s probably why you’re starting to push back - you’re more alive to your own needs.