A guy and I recently reconnected after a period of little to no contact. He asked for my number earlier this year, but ghosted after about 2 months (just texting, no dates or future thinking).
We still saw each other in person from time to time and eventually destabilised, became somewhat flirty again. Last week he confessed he still kept my number (our last contact was me saying it's best we delete each others contacts), and that his reason for never pursuing anything was a personal barrier and he was flattered I was interested. He also said he knows there'll come a time when he does ask me out, when he overcomes this barrier, and I'll tell him I've met someone, and he'll only have himself to blame.
For reference, there's an age gap (he's older), and he still lives with his ex.
The day after this conversation he reopened texting, the first evening he was initially curt with me when I didn't reply after about a half hour saying I was being quiet, he said he knows he can't give me what I want (a relationship) but he doesn't want to lose me, and doesn't want to lose "this".
He continues his same pattern from when we previously text, no weekend texting from him, and no texting on his day off.
The dynamic shifted quickly from texting to flirtation, sexting, sharing intimate photos, and yesterday we kissed. Albeit in a very intimate, public moment with mutual touching and tension, immediately after he asked if he could come over next Wednesday to mine for sex, but framing it as "platonic" and leaving me feeling unsure, especially since he has previously told me he can’t give me what I want.
Im uneasy with this, because he finishes work early in the day, and I don't work Wednesdays. So it's likely he'll come around, we'll have sex, and he'll go home (to his ex), that evening.
Throughout our interactions, he has made flirtatious comments, sexual gestures, and maintained teasing, yet he continues to set boundaries that suggest he's not looking for a committed relationship. I like him and enjoy the emotional and playful parts of our connection, but I am concerned that moving further physically, especially so suddenly, into sex, might put me in a vulnerable position with someone who has clearly stated he cannot commit.
I really like him, do I accept that this is all he can offer me and see him, hoping he'll change his mind. Or do I put my own boundary in place and say not until he's ready to offer more, or we don't do it at all.
I can't help but feel this is just him "getting his fix" and preventing any "regrets" he mentions he might have if he waits too long and I move on.