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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Bumped into him at the park.

8 replies

Blondiedoggylover16 · 26/09/2025 13:44

A little update on my two previous posts. I'd got sick of my partner drinking every night and being a twat on occasion on alcohol. We hot on well in general apart from this and i do care about him. He drank every night. I finished with him in January for three months but he eventually persuaded me to give it another go. We don't live together but he lives very closeby. Anyway, he was a twat on Sunday night ringing and texting and saying I fancied some bloke I hardly know that I spoke to briefly on Saturday. Not true at all. I don't flirt. End of. So i bumped into him there in the park and he said he feels great and has been decorating his flat and has been off the drink all week. I said good for you but was very dry with him. He was going on and on about how great he feels not drinking and he was off it for good. I just rolled my eyes and said well why didn't you do that after we were split up for three months? I proceeded to say we are better off as friends. He got shirty then and said he wasn't going to beg. I said it was ridiculous him accusing me of flirting with a man I hardly know and he didn't apologise. This man had won a lot of money on the lottery. I couldn't care less! He then proceeded to say he didn't like the man and the way he was getting on with me. I said that wasn't my problem! He then asked me if this man was now on my facebook! I said don't be ridiculous and there you go again. 5 days off the booze and he thinks he has seen the light and I should come running back like nothing has happened. We said our goodbyes and he went on his way. He lives very closeby and I bump into him a lot walking our dogs. It was my birthday yesterday and it tainted it a bit but Im lucky as my parents are still alive and I have a couple of close friends, my son and my dog.

OP posts:
Girlmom35 · 26/09/2025 13:57

So you bumped into him.
Do you have a question?

Blondiedoggylover16 · 26/09/2025 14:00

No not really. Just think he will never change. Kicking off again about that man I bumped into was ridiculous.

OP posts:
AttilaTheMeerkat · 26/09/2025 14:31

Thankfully you and he are no longer together because his primary relationship is with drink.

He is not worth caring about and will
merely continue to try and drag you down with him. Read about codependency, are you codependent?.

Blondiedoggylover16 · 26/09/2025 15:09

AttilaTheMeerkat · 26/09/2025 14:31

Thankfully you and he are no longer together because his primary relationship is with drink.

He is not worth caring about and will
merely continue to try and drag you down with him. Read about codependency, are you codependent?.

I don't know. I will read about it. Thank you.

OP posts:
Blondiedoggylover16 · 26/09/2025 15:11

Blondiedoggylover16 · 26/09/2025 15:09

I don't know. I will read about it. Thank you.

I think he is very dependent on Mr but I am stronger and can manage on my own. He makes me feel guilty then like I am cold snd callous for dumping him..

OP posts:
OrlandointheWilderness · 26/09/2025 16:05

Possibly you need to think why you are giving this enough head space that it tainted your birthday and you’ve made a MN post about it. Man’s a twat. Leave him far behind in the past and don’t give him a single atom of brain cell because he doesn’t deserve it.

Endofyear · 26/09/2025 16:51

Stop giving him any headspace and move on with your life OP.

Arlanymor · 26/09/2025 17:00

If someone had treated me like that the previous weekend I wouldn’t have stopped to talk to him in the park at all. I do think that sometimes breaking up with someone means doing it all the way - deleting/blocking their number, removing them from social media, and maintaining your distance. I get that you can’t help bumping into someone but you can choose not to have a conversation - particularly as this conversation did nothing but annoy you! You need to start treating this whole situation as one that is firmly in your past.

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