He’s 16 years younger than me

[Saucymaucy]

I’m 44, he’s 28. Says he loves me, happy to be a step dad to my children. Behaves as though he’s infatuated and obsessed with me. Mentions quite a bit about the future and what it will look like for us.

now here’s the kicker, we’ve never met, known each other online for only 3 weeks. We’ve FaceTimed and called many times, 2 hour phone calls and multiple messages throughout the day.

it’s now week 4 and he’s heavily cut contact, barely messaging, hours without replying to the point he last messaged a few days ago asking when it’s best to call, I replied and have heard nothing since!

what the hell!!

He’s a stranger whom you do not know at all. His love-bombing behaviour is deranged and a massive red flag. By 44 you should know better than to have gone along with this fantasy in the first place, but now he’s shown his true colours, learn the lesson and walk away with dignity.

Please don't talk about your kids with a random man you have only 'met' online. A man offering to be a step father to kids he's never met, belonging to a woman he's never met is at best a scammer and potentially something worse.

JFC - this is one of those threads I seriously hope isn’t real

I met DP on Killing Kittens when he was 27 and I was 45. Five years later we’re still together.

But he was the perfect gentleman, had clear communication and certainly didn’t make stupid declarations of love.

I can’t believe you gave your personal information so readily to a man you’d never met in real life, especially one with so many red flags.

I think you need some help/ counselling.
No normal 44 year old woman with children goes on a website called Fabswingers, online chats with a man and within 3 weeks believes that a person they've not even met, is in love with them and is prepared to be a stepfather.
That's not just naivete, that's someone with a real problem.

I am worried you have severe mental health issues are you are not even aware of it. Your behaviour is very concerning. Make an appointment with a psychologist as soon as possible.

It’s only ever recommended for people looking for hook ups or casual shags not a step father for the kids

Come on, you know full well it's not a traditional dating site.

Wise up op.

You know damn fine that’s not a traditional dating site.

It is a sex site. That’s it.

You never met him but you’d told him all about your kids?

wise up - and quickly.

It's not real and you don't know him. No matter how long you chat online and how well you think you know him it's not real till you meet face to face. I also find the fact he's been talking about being your kids' stepdad creepy and weird when he hasn't even met you. You need to be careful with what you're putting out there or you're putting yourself in a very vulnerable position.

Forgot about him, he's love bombed you, none of what he said will he follow through with. I would block and forget about him, sorry

Me as a man: at 24, i met a single mum of 2 and she was 32, it took a year for me to realise I was a young boy straight out of uni figuring my life and i had no business settling for a big woman who was a mother and had walked down the isle with her kids' father and experienced life. I love bombed her as I felt like it was an Accomplishment(most young men who talk or sleep with older women think like this, trust me)

My own ex-DW who is 37 and we got 2 kids:

Last bf is now 29 - cheated on her non stop with 23/25 year olds and promised to be a good step dad and once he dumped her after seeing the responsibility it takes, he told her he needs someone his own age/younger and no kids.

One before that should be about 27 now, love bombed her for 4 weeks and telling her what she once to hear, once they slept together , he was back on social media meeting women.

I warned her each tome and had to pick up the pieces each time.

I just googled killing kittens and i am still confused? is it some sort of sex parties? how did you meet "on" it?

I am intrigued

sorry, are you serious? No one gets love from fab.

I hope you are joking

Surely this is a wind up 😬

Don't be hard on yourself! You may have given out your name and address, but you've avoided falling for the bigger scam.

More than that, if someone scams you it's not your fault. Anyone can fall for a scam if it's the right conditions, and you have to trust if you're looking for a new partner.

It's almost like that's why the scammers target people who are looking for love...

If this is a scam (which it does sound like to be honest), there's only one person who is to blame - and that is the scammer.

What kind of a scam do you think it is?

Somewhere to live
Someone to live off
Someone for sex

Are you really saying that you don’t know what swingers are? The name makes it obvious that people are looking for hookups.

Fab is not a dating site. It’s a hook up site. You have to be very careful on there. I’m on it and there are a lot of arsehole men on there. I never put my real name or location you have to be careful. And develop a thick skin because it’s not for the feint hearted

Just him saying he would be happy to be a stepdad to your kids after 3 weeks should of had you running! Red flags all over the place on this one. Block him and be done with it