Marriage breakdown. Please tell me it gets better?

[OhCrikeyWhattodo]

My world has recently turned upside down after my marriage abruptly came to an end. Since the discovery my STBXH has tried pleading, drinking to excess, threatening suicide and to hurt his affair partner (in a truly terrifying and very real manner causing me to run away), sad-bombing me (as if my own pain isn’t enough to carry) and the latest is being just plain nasty about leaving and dragging his heels.

I feel completely out of control, desperate for a safe space to call my own, and very bleak about the future. Please could some kind mumsnetters come and tell me it gets better and maybe recommend any reading on how to support my kids and myself through this transition. How long did it take for you to feel less broken?

My goodness, OP. That is horrifying.

Are there children involved? What sort of living situation do you have? Are you in a rental or is the place owned? Could you go somewhere and end the lease/force a sale of the house?

As for things getting better: They definitely will. You may not be able to see it right now, because you are in a highly stressful crisis situation, but once your find a safe place to live things will slowly start to get better. It's amazing what a change of circumstances can do for your mind.

Are you safe? Is the affair partner safe? If he's threatening to hurt anyone the police need to be informed.

Yes I am safe, planning to try and return back to my house, accompanied, today. If he’s still there and refuses to go, I’ll have to call the police and ask for their help. I won’t bring the kids along so they don’t see anything scary. Need to get the kids back into their routine after having to flee so desperate to return. How long will it take to feel more normal? Does anyone have any good advice on when and how to talk to children about what is changing for them?