Reporting family members to children services

[Sprinkleandsparkles]

Has anyone done this before and how did it go? Did it blow up your family? Did your close family cut you off?

Im in a horrible position with a sibling. They have 2 young vunerable children and the relationship between sibling and partner is toxic. Arguing in front of children, physical hitting in front of children. No supervision when using sharp/dangerous items. Looking dirty and neglected. Putting children in potentially dangerous situations. Clothes too small. Will buy clothes for themselves though and get lots of other things for themselves. Sibling partner stated to our parent they are scared of her. The whole family tiptoes around her and the situations that are created in that family.
Our Parents pretty much just give words of advise but nothing ever chances. Ive pretty much been told that I shouldn't get anyone else involved.
There's so much more but it could be quite outing. Im at the point where I dont feel like I can just do nothing anymore. I feel like I need to tell a professional.
Im pretty sure ill probably be disowned by my entire family though. Won't be able to see niece/nephew anymore.
I want to help but im just so sad and also feel so angry at sibling for putting me in this position. Its not fair. I want to shake them and say wake up you have 2 children who you need to look after!

Bump

If you believe the children are at risk then you absolutely need to report this. The safeguarding of the children is priority and it seems like the sibling you mention is unable to protect her children. Probably because she is a victim herself.

Please report to social care so they can carry out an assessment. It can also be anonymous.

Im a professional who works closely with some of the most dangerous individuals in society, so I see more often than not the damage of domestic abuse and the impact on children.

How old are the children?

I think it’s inevitable it will cause problems within your family and you might be disowned, but at the same time it doesn’t sound good and should be reported if it’s as bad as you say. I think it’s a rock and a hard place situation for you.

Report, they won't even know it's you. If it's that bad school and neighbours could report, workman working nearby, literally anything.

Better to be responsible for the saving of children's mental health and wellbeing, and in turn their future children's wellbeing and mental health than to be complicit.

You can report anonymously to Children's Social Care directly or visit the NSPCC. They will contact schools for more information on the children and schools may well have similar concerns already.
If it helps you frame it better, think of it as a referral for help for the children rather than "reporting" .

But what do I say because surely I have alot of info and it will be obvious who its come from?

Tbh though a few weeks ago the neighbours were outside with their phone looking concerned. I didnt think much of it until my mum told me they often scream and shout at home in front of the children and now im thinking were the neighbours concerned

Is this just secondhand information from your mum? Or have you witnessed it?

Have you not just written on the stately homes thread (that I follow) that you have cut off contact with your parents for being racist, fattist, homophobic etc? If that was you, your mum doesn’t sound the most reliable source of information!

Some is secondhand. Some ive witnessed.
Yes that was me on the stately thread. My family is pretty toxic tbh. I've distanced myself alot just feel sorry for niece and nephew

If it's as bad as you believe it to be then you just need to advise what you know. You can't report for simply shouting as that's not enough. But i thought your original post made is seem you have witnessed or been aware of :

Emotional neglect
Physical abuse witnessing and potentially at harm of
Cleanliness issues
Neglect in terms of basic amenities, e.g Clothing
Domestic abuse

So surely most of these would be witnessed by school and neighbours and therefore be many people that could have reported it...

It now doesn't quite add up if you aren't sure what you can report or if it would be noticeable who from?

I think you should report it. SS will follow up with calls to school to see if they have anything to report. Neighbours might be asked as well.

You can do it anonymously, just say that you are afraid of them and that you just wanted SS to know that the children are being neglected and live in a violent environment and that you are concerned for their safety.

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility. Do they attend school regularly? They may already be on the school's radar. Don't tell anyone in the family you have reported them of u are worried about repercussions. Report your concerns