How did you make new friends in adulthood?

[mallorys]

Just that really. How did you make new friends that you didn’t go to school/uni with? I moved not too long ago and don’t know anyone here. I’m currently a SAHM so don’t have a workplace to make friends.

Do you have any hobbies, where you could meet like minded people? Or join a Church/other faith community. Maybe as a SAHM join toddler groups or get to know parents at the school gate. It might take time, but you'll get there. If your children are in school, volunteer to help out with whatever you can.

I used to be on an app called peanut for making mom friends. Bumble also had a friends section and there was Meetup . Not sure if these are still available but might be worth a look or for similar

I was very lonely until I had children and didn't have any friends who I would socialise with.
When my first child started nursery I started to make conversation with other mums and met 2 amazing people.
I then met more mums when my children started school.
All it takes is one little opening but saying "hi" can be hard. You have to force yourself to try. If they are part of a group of mums who do things then you might slowly get involved and have people.
I now have 2 different groups of friends made solely from being a parent.
My other groups are through people I have worked with.

Work, and more recently via a running club. I had to stick at the latter for a while though, there was a good 3 months where I barely knew anyone.

Nursery, school, playgroups etc. I don't know if it's just me though but I do find the friendships very surface level, often more like friendly acquaintances than actual friends. But while life is very full on with 2 small kids I kind of prefer that for now, it may change in a few years time.

By giving birth....

Local activities lead to local friends (who are convenient and easy to stay in touch with)

If your kids are older I'd look at something like an evening class (exercise or otherwise) thats local yoga in a church hall vs. At virgin active

Doing courses is my top tip, but not the type where you learn alone - I mean the courses where you’re learning with others or sharing experiences (counselling, languages) preferably for at least a year.

I’m childfree so the school gate wasn’t an option - I made most of my friends through women’s rights campaigning & volunteering at my local cat rescue.

I made new friends by getting involved in women's rights. Joining my local WRN group was particularly helpful.

Work and then having babies
Tennis club, church, member of a political party, the children's activities. I found being a sahm v v sociable.

volunteering, PTA, gym classes, a team sport and work

I think all my friends made in the last 15 years are through my kids but some of them are definitely friends for life. Another old friend of mine who I am not local to has made a whole new local friendship group through a running club.

Kids & choir.

Doesn't have to be choir, but it’s a common group activity.

From choir (or, insert unique and outing hobby 😆) I have:
• a couch to 5k friend
• a new job through a connection there
• lots of new furniture free from people getting rid
• a good handful of friends and about 40 people to exchange pleasantries with, once a week at rehearsal and out and about if bump into them

Then I have my mum friends. The hit rate is not so good though. I have 3 kids and 10 years of parenting experience and 4 proper friends. Again lots of acquaintances.

To add, I had a lot of very lonely years - thank god I had DH! - and you just have to keep putting yourself out there. It will work out.

Nct, baby and toddler activities and volunteering for nct/pta. As well as school mums

Ante natal classes. School gate. Kids activities. My hobbies, neighbours.

Special interest groups - choir, yoga, painting, local history, knitting, whatever. This is a good time of year to look for something to join, as classes and groups are getting going again after summer breaks.

And look for 'Friends of...' groups relating to local historic houses, churches, museums, gardens, open spaces etc.

The only way I have made friends is through work colleagues and baby groups. Then initiating meet ups and keeping in touch. It has to work both ways though, they have to initiate to otherwise it's just one way. Also, even if you haven't seen them for ages still ok to text to meet up ! X

Got a dog
Joined an orchestra
Joined a string quartet (I literally pasted "amateur cellist seeks quartet" ads in local music shops etc to get this off the ground)
Starting a trio next week
Also met friends on music courses

Single. Childfree.

Would still say my circle is small, but perfectly formed. :-)