Shift work

[Moms2114]

I work full time mon-fri 9-5 I usually get kids sorted in the morning drop little one to creach and head to work. I grab the little one on the way home at 5.30 home for 6pm.

My partner works shift so sometimes can have 4 days off during the week.

This morning I told him I was frustrated as when I got home last night I was handed the mince and asked to make a start on dinner so he can chill before going to work at 7pm .
He got home at 9am had a sleep and then did odd fix jobs in the house. He did clean around.
I make the dinner but was annoyed and frustrated. On his days where he is off I'm sometimes making dinner also . And he finds things to "be done"

Am I wrong for being annoyed

You are not wrong
days off - the partner should pick up the load
of course the shift workers needs rest and sleep but there’s a balance to be had
is taking the kids to the crèche ever? Picking up slack like laundry, appointments, cooking or is it all on you?
there needs to be more balance for sure

If I’m understanding correctly, the problem seems to be that he’s determining what needs done when and by whom. He clearly does take on some of the household chores, but it looks like you two need to discuss things properly and draw up a fair schedule.

But you’re not unreasonable to be annoyed by him giving you orders. If he’d asked whether you would mind making dinner without shoving the mince into your hands in a way that made it plain that ‘no’ wasn’t an acceptable answer, that would likely have gone over better.

I usually always bring little one to creach even if he gets in early as he's tired.
On his days off as she cries if not woken by me I usually wake her and he will bring her to creach if he wakes.

Nothing is like routine if he's off he will do it, sometimes he just might put a wash on depends on how he's feels. I think he makes up jobs sometimes as He does have a Trade, like aw I had to go there and have a look at a job. But if I mention house stuff he gets defensive and says IV been doing loads but it isn't household things. That I then have to do , which mainly is washing and dinners

There does need to be balance but if he's working nights then thats not going to be a normal sleeping pattern.

The last night he works at least half of the next "day off" is sleep

Yes I understand he needs his sleep and I am fine with that, it's when he takes it upon him self to do "jobs" on his working days then I get home and he's tired to do the dinner.

So I'm over reacting?
All my hours at home I have the kids the weekends I have the kids and the evenings. I just said to him that on his days off his time is his and I don't get that. Therefore I would be great full of he can take some weight when I'm working and he's at home.