MIL showed sisters my wedding dress?

[MichelleRodriguezxx]

Two things recently I feel like are odd that my MIL has done. We have had a troubled relationship.

we went together to get my wedding dress as I’m in my husbands country without my mum, she took a video at the end and when we was walking out I said don’t show anyone the video! And she said oh no I only took it for your mum! Ok cool.

today I get a text from my finances older sister saying hey my mum showed me your dress you look lovely. I recently had an argument with her too so I’m wondering if she’s just trying to get me to bite. I responded politely and said thank you so much and said how pleased I am to find it, yet can’t help but think it should be the bride showing people her wedding dress?

my fiance has been away with work for 5 nights and MIL knows this. He’s on his way back today and she texts him at the airport saying let’s get together tonight lol. I’m just so confused why she would think my fiance wants to go to his mums house straight from the airport. He doesn’t land until 8pm and hasn’t seen me for nearly a week. Maybe she’s drunk as she drinks heavily. Isn’t that odd or am I over reacting? She over steps boundaries all of the time hence why I feel some type of way towards this. We aren’t seeing her tonight I’m just set back how she actually thinks we wouldn’t want to spend time together?

Where's your husband in all this?

He should be telling him mum not to show people the dress and telling her he's not meeting for coffee, he can do that the following day.

Do you think he should tell her? Then she’ll know it bothered me and I’ll look like I’m making a big deal out of her excitement. I know how this works now.

Is the plan that you’ll live in this country once you’re married? I don’t think that’s a good idea, as you clearly have a bad relationship with your husband’s family. You need to be living somewhere where you’ll have people who you can count on.

This woman is staking her claim, most definitely and deliberately. She is intending to remain Queen Bee. To have done what she did re your wedding dress is inexcusable, she is not a woman to be trusted. I’d be keeping my distance from her.

Both things sound like a non-event to me. Granted, I probably wouldn't share the image of your dress myself but I would definitely internally raise my eyebrows at your request. It could be as simple as her getting excited about her son getting married. But then again, I come from a "normal" family where people care about each other.
A request to see her son is also a non-issue. She offered, he said no. What's the big deal. She wouldn't have thought whether or not he wanted to spend time with her. She simply asked. Which is an absolutely normal thing to do. Arguably, more normal than trying to read someone's mind. Maybe she missed him and wanted to catch up. It's honestly not that deep.

But, of course, there will be the usual MN chorus trying to convince you that she is a narcissist or something...

She’s clearly excited about it all.

Taking photos of things like wedding dresses on mobile devices has only really been a thing for the last 15 years or so, so I don't think there's some kind of traditional etiquette that you have recourse to here. Also, if he has been away I don't see how it's a big deal for her to want to see him. Fine for him to say no of course but I don't see how her asking is somehow her stepping over boundaries?

She’s done it now. She was rude and has crossed a line.

Realistically there’s not much you can do.

just give them a wide berth in the future

Rethink marrying him if this is his family and he cannot stand up to them.
No man is worth the drama of an awful family.

MichelleRodriguezxx
She doesn't like you,
You'll never be good enough
Never will/too drunk to care about your feelings
Am 'worried' about where you'll live when married?
If you're stuck in a strange country you could become at her mercy as "mother-in-law" rules suddenly apply
Get your "fiancee" onside and tell him none of its right especially with the boundary overstepping
He may be her little boy
But your grown-up husband
Ideal solution
Marry then escape; sorry move elsewhere
Or, if what she says always goes
Do you really want to be a part of that?
She'll see it as 'yes' because you married her boy........