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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Do you always trust your gut feeling?

2 replies

Tinnn5 · 28/08/2025 16:43

I’m with my partner a while now but something in my gut just tells me this is not the relationship for me, this is not the man I should spend my life with. I can’t figure out why and can’t quite put my finger on the feeling but it’s always there.
is your gut feeling always right?

OP posts:
ComtesseDeSpair · 28/08/2025 17:36

Have you a good, patient, logical friend you could talk with it about? Or would you consider just sitting and writing down, as it comes to you, without a lot of pre-thinking, what your reservations are? You might feel as though it’s something nebulous you can’t place your finger on but I think with a long term relationship it’s less likely to be a “gut feeling” - and more that you do probably consciously know why the relationship isn’t right, and why you aren’t the right partners for each other, but haven’t found a way to express it and therefore make it make sense.

Even if it’s little things, which standing alone and don’t in the immediacy when they happen seem like relationship ending-worthy issues, getting them all out out there and being able to reflect can help you to see that it’s actually what all these little things represent in aggregate.

Tinnn5 · 28/08/2025 22:15

ComtesseDeSpair · 28/08/2025 17:36

Have you a good, patient, logical friend you could talk with it about? Or would you consider just sitting and writing down, as it comes to you, without a lot of pre-thinking, what your reservations are? You might feel as though it’s something nebulous you can’t place your finger on but I think with a long term relationship it’s less likely to be a “gut feeling” - and more that you do probably consciously know why the relationship isn’t right, and why you aren’t the right partners for each other, but haven’t found a way to express it and therefore make it make sense.

Even if it’s little things, which standing alone and don’t in the immediacy when they happen seem like relationship ending-worthy issues, getting them all out out there and being able to reflect can help you to see that it’s actually what all these little things represent in aggregate.

Thank you, I do have 2 good friends that I’ve spoke about this with.
they both have said the same thing (separately) that they feel I don’t have very strong feelings for this man by my words and actions

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