Is this normal for a first/second date/meet up?

[Mars2020]

I don't have much experience dating men. In my mid 20s, been on a few dates with a few guys but never been in a real relationship in my life.
Went out with this guy from work who's in his 30s. We were chilling in his car chatting, he leaned in to kiss me and I kissed him back. But not even 20 seconds into the kiss, he stuck his hand in my trousers into my knickers. I told him to stop and pushed his hand away. He then put his hands up my shirt and started feeling my breasts. I told him to stop again.
He stopped and we chatted before I got out of the car to go home. He leaned in to kiss me the second time and once again quickly stuck his hand under my shirt to touch my breast though I had told him the first time not to! I just feel gross and a bit violated. Is this normal or is it creepy and too over familiar towards a girl you don't know that well?

Thank you for your kind words. He made an inappropriate comment at work a few months ago he said to me in the kitchen while I was warming up my food that I looked like a sexy teacher that he could fantasise about. I felt quite creeped out and said that was very unprofessional and not appropriate for work. He then apologised in a passive aggressive way. I did tell my supervisor what he'd said but her response was to brush it off and wait until he said something similar again.

He's a lunatic OP. Find another job if you can!

This isn't verging assault, it is assault. I don't think you should have anything to do with him and to be honest I would speak to my boss. I'm very disappointed in how your boss responded last time. I've worked at some pretty shit places but they would've picked him up on that. You sound really lovely and you deserve so much better than this. Do you know any men, even men who are married, who you know just wouldn't behave like this? I think it's always good to have somebody in mind, not for a relationship of course, but to look at the standards of behaviour that you want in a date

They used to be a thing years ago when women would say what would Madonna do and they would base their actions on that. It meant they were not a people pleaser. I think you need someone like that, but someone you know, where you know they would not behave in that way. You should then judge the man you go out with on that behaviour.

How did you end up on multiple dates with someone who already made you feel uncomfortable, to the extent you’d reported them to your supervisor? You are in no way to blame for his appalling behaviour but you need to work on your boundaries.

Not normal at all

This is sexual assault @Mars2020 .

He's a pushy sex pest. No, most men would not behave like that.

Yes this is assault. Not your fault, not because of anything you did or saud. Its who he is. He absolutely tries it in with every woman he can. Read “the gift if fear” by gavin debecker and start learning how to stiff arm these bastards.

I personally don’t know if I would say that this is assault. However, you’ve created a thread online about this — and it has obviously made you feel uncomfortable, therefore I think you need to tell this man that you are not interested in anything and stop any communication that might say otherwise.

Not normal girl, nonce behaviour! Run

Yeah it’s grim but pretty standard behaviour when I was growing up. The word normal doesn’t apply here. Wrong? Yes. Common? Yes.

The consent seems blurry, but I’ve experienced this on dates as well - I don’t think it’s right. However, I think with some men you need to explicitly say no… otherwise they’ll be opportunistic and they’ll read the fact that you kissed or reciprocated a kiss as consensual for further stuff. Again, I don’t think this is right.

I'm not sure I actually understand this...?!?!?! 🤯🤯🤯

Actually my spidey senses are tingling with this thread. I don't think it's legit.

But not even 20 seconds into the kiss, he stuck his hand in my trousers into my knickers. I told him to stop and pushed his hand away. He then put his hands up my shirt and started feeling my breasts. I told him to stop again.

I think someone is having a little fantasy here. And he is using us to pursue it.

Having done an advanced search, I'm totally confused, though not for the same reason as you.

So if you’re a virgin how did your daughter come to be? Surely not an immaculate conception?

Doesn't drive, but nearly ran over a dog?
I'm all for slightly altering details for anonymity, but that's too far.

😦