Drop off & seeing violent ex

[LadyBlakeneysHanky]

Hi there. Name changed for this.

I spent over a decade with a violent bully who smashed my head against the floor, raped me & made my life a misery.

I no longer have any contact with this charmer.

My eldest son is starting university in Sept. I’ve arranged to drive him to the uni town, & stay in an Airbnb the night before, so he can get there in good time on the Saturday drop off.

His father (my ex) also wants to see the accommodation & my son wants him to do so. I’m planning to do the drop off and look round at a different time from my ex. I am not prepared to see him & either ignore him or give him a ‘hello’. But in the circs is this fair?

My priority is my son who has had difficulties & needs a positive start at uni.

I think in the circumstances you're being very reasonable. Presumably your son has some idea of how abusive your ex was, even if he doesn't know the whole story? He's getting to have both his parents see his accommodation and get him settled but there's no reason why you should have to spend any time in the company of your abuser. Well done on handling it as well as you are, you are obviously a great mum! 💐

Thank you so much! I do want him to experience a positive start. So did not want to be unreasonable. Just have to hope he makes it through freshers’ week now! 😬