Age gaps

[ThatFlakyAzurePanda]

If you use apps for dating what do you set your age preferences to if you are 43?

Not really into big age gaps myself. My parents are 70 and 73 so definitely do not wish to date someone who is old enough to be my parents 😂

Do you think a 10 year age gap is too big at 43?

I dated someone 17 years older and that was too much so NEVER again!

I want someone who is the same generation so basically anyone 80s born or early 90s.

Though I may quit the apps permanently and just enjoy life doing my interests and meet men that way.

It is hard to put a specific number on something like this because each person is different and so much of what spurs one to think the age gap is too great really is a generalized way of saying . . . "they are too immature," "we cannot connect on anything meaningful," etc.

Maybe start with 10 years and see who comes back, and then if you find you are still not getting what you are interested in, move it down to 8?

Presuming one is not cradle snatching then I think by the time you are 40 you are comfortable to not give a monkeys what other people think and that you only have one life and if something feels right then go for it.

At your age probably 35-45 though the trickiest bit (for me) would be that I would not date men with children under about 16.

I’d say 38-48 from my time on the apps. Mid 30’s men are spectacularly immature, and by about 50 they often tend to be irrevocably damaged by previous relationships, negative and often can’t fend for themselves. And the older men were far more letchy and entitled.
There will always be the exception and this is obviously a generalisation but based on actual experience of talking to that age group. Although not recently.

Depends how important to you vitality/zest for life, and sexual performance are, I think.

I used to mostly date older (not intentionally, just turned out that way), but from briefly trying a few dating events and apps a couple of years ago, the 40+ men mostly seemed half dead:
"Oh, when I was younger I used to ski/scuba/climb/etc" - well, I still do all those things and I want someone fit and active, so that's no good.

I actually gave up and met people organically, but I reckon I'd be looking 32-45, since slightly older men will try it on anyway, even when they're outside your age range.
Although with the younger ones I'd likely be wanting to know that they had no kids, and no desire to have kids, otherwise we'll be at different life stages - but there are plenty of men who don't.