Feeling a bit lost

[Tania890]

I have been with my partner for 19 years, but things have changed since he got promoted at work. I have been a stay at home partner looking after the home. This was a joint decision and for many years it seems to have kept us both happy.
But recently he's been coming home from work and being silent towards me. I always ask him how he's day went at work as sometimes he barely says anything to me.
I don't know if it's my imagination as I keep questioning myself.
He's attitude towards money lately is very childish. He wants to get tattoos that is going to cost him £600 but doesn't want to spend £300 getting his teeth done which I find really strange as he needs to see the dentist. He makes me feel guilty for not booking holidays as all his colleagues at work are asking him why he's not been on holiday this year? I have booked all our holidays in the past but this year we hadn't really given it much thought as our plans was to save a bit of money, so I thought...
Since he got promoted to a higher position he's making more money and told me that we should put equal amounts into our own savings account after all the bills are paid for and other expenses. We have been doing just that. But recently he's been spending lots of money on silly things and then asks me how much I have saved in my own account? It's making me feel a bit uncomfortable as we share a joint account and the amount that goes into my savings account is exactly the same that goes into his.
The only conversation s we have is about his job, anything else just doesn't seem to count.
He shows no interest in anything that Im interested in he seems to be on another planet.
We went out for dinner and if I didn't make conversation he barely said anything to me. I feel like I'm getting in his way and I'm walking on eggshells most of the time as he gets very defensive when he disagrees with me.
I love my partner dearly and I'm always there for him but something feels off.
Am I overthinking?

Thank you for your advice

You're a stay at home partner?

Do you have children together?

I’d start looking for a job.

How can you both save the same amount if your a sahm,
Op you need other interest outside the home, stop focusing on him, can you get a job, join the gym,
Why can't both of you sit down and book a holiday together, that would open up conversations,

OP how old are the kids? It’s good you have some savings but I always think it’s sensible to have some regular income (even if it’s a part time job) and a secret F off fund if you’re a SAH partner. So I would look at this as he sounds like he’s checked out if he will only talk about work, and that’s if promoted. If you do have children I’d at least expect some interest in doing things as a family and talking about the family and the home.

You're not married and don't work? Is the house rented/owned, joint names/his name?

I interpret SAHP as not having kids and aren’t married. Therefore to be frank you are his unemployed girlfriend. It sounds like he resents this and therefore you. It’s strange that it has come at a time when he has been promoted but it could be because he sees that despite working hard he still doesn’t have money for a ‘bit of fun’ because you moan about his spending and don’t contribute financially. It seems funny that you would complain about him getting a tattoo when it’s his money. I understand you think his priority should be his teeth but he’s a grown man who can make his own decisions.

I would be looking for a job because either the resentment has soured the relationship and there is no going back in which case you will be in a very vulnerable position not being married or it will save your relationship.