DH says I have made him uncomfortable??

[FunnyHazelPeer]

I’m very confused.

myself and DH are trying for baby number 3, last night we were doing the deed (sorry TMI but relevant) where I then moved myself, like I’m talking an inch to the left.

afterwards DH said I made him feel very uncomfortable during that and he now feels weird. I asked what he meant and he said “I don’t know I just felt uncomfortable” and I asked what physically or emotionally and he said emotionally.

he couldn’t tell me what I’d done so we left at that.

this evening I have approached the subject again and asked what I did wrong. DH said he thinks I’m gaslighting him because I keep going on about it? I said I wanted to know what I did to make sure I don’t do that again.

hes just said he wants to forget about it. But I’m totally confused. If I try and bring it up he just says he wishes he hadn’t said anything. I’ve said it’s unfair for him to make a sweeping statement and he just thinks I’m making things “about me”

the only thing I can think of is that when I repositioned myself, has it made him feel awkward as he’s taken that as I wasn’t enjoying it????? But I feel that’s a stretch!!

any ideas? - also am I wildly overthinking this?

Well for starters, he’s totally misunderstood what gaslighting means. In fact you’re doing the opposite as you’re acknowledging his feelings as true and correct as expressed by him but simply asking him to elaborate further so you know what you did in order to not repeat whatever it is that’s caused his discomfort. He sounds quite immature to not want to entertain your Qs in which case why bring it up then?

Anyway, I just wanted to emphasise with you. I have no ideas what his issue is though so maybe some wiser MNers will be able to shed light on that.

Are you sure he wants another DC?

Does he do things to confuse you and make you question yourself often?

Ask him to think about how he would feel if you'd said he'd made you uncomfortable during sex but then refused to say how so he could avoid doing it again. Ask him how you're supposed to relax and connect with him the next time you have sex when all you're going to be thinking about is whether anything you're doing is making him uncomfortable! His lack of communication could potentially ruin your sex life together, surely he doesn't want that?

Sounds like he has warped ideas about sex. A woman is supposed to be 100% into it at all times and isn't supposed to express any requests or discomfort e.g. move to the left. How much porn has he been watching?