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Moving for a new start

2 replies

Orangecrumble · 03/08/2025 10:07

I'm separated with dc. My ex lives locally, and my dc and I are still in the old family home which is too expensive to run and maintain long term, so we're going to have to sell it in a couple of years when our youngest dc is 16.

I'm really craving a fresh start - I do love the town I'm in, but it's quite small, and I feel most people here are in a traditional family set up. When I meet up with my local friends, I just feel that our lives are so different now - they're talking about their husbands and doing things as a family etc, and the reality of my life is now very different. I just feel ready to move on somehow.

House prices are so expensive where I am that with my share of the equity, if I stayed around this area I would only be able to afford somewhere very small and probably not very nice. Whereas if I moved into a cheaper area, I could get a lot more for my money. I was thinking of going somewhere where there is a community that I would be interested in, art, culture etc.

My job is remote so I can wfh anywhere.

My worry is that it's not fair on the dc. One is at university, one works from home and the other is still at school but will finish in 2 years. I wouldn't move before the youngest had finished school. The older two don't have a huge circle of local friends, the youngest has a few close local friends, but is pretty confident and I'm sure she'd be fine to start a 6th form college elsewhere.

But even as older teens, I wonder if it is nice for them to be in the town they grew up, all the familiar things, their old schools, people and neighbours they know?

(My ex has said that if I move areas he is happy to move too (although not too close!), as he also feels like he would want a fresh start, so the dc would still be able to see him frequently)

I was wondering if anyone has moved areas in similar circumstances and how did it turn out?

OP posts:
Bittenonce · 03/08/2025 11:36

The fixed points in this are: Long term, the house has got to go. Short term (2 years) it would be hard on your youngest to move area before GCSEs. No one wants the cost and stress of buying and selling twice in a short period. The other things don’t really matter….
Id be tempted - if it’s financially feasible - to sell asap, move to rented nearby you can be ready to buy again wherever really suits you between GCSEs finishing and 6th form starting. It might be the best way of getting your ‘proper’ move timing right, leaving the sale for a couple of years might make it tricky to get it right.

Orangecrumble · 03/08/2025 12:50

@Bittenonce Thanks - that's helpful to look at it like that! Selling this house and then renting nearby had crossed my mind but I had then thought that that would then mean I would potentially be moving again to a new area all within the space of two years! But I know if you're buying from renting it is much less stressful and gives you more options.

There isn't an ideal solution in this scenario, but I think what you've mentioned is a good idea, thanks.

OP posts:
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