How to build emotional support not inn your husband

[IsItatrashmarriage]

Someone mentioned on a forum that why the poster does not build emotional support in someone else while being married because the spouse is emotionally distant or tired or not able to communicate

I think my husband is ND and that he does not not know how to communicate with me which has many back stories but I cannot write the whole thing, most people won't understand why I have chosen to marry him or to stay with him. I am not abused but obviously not respected as much as I would want to.

What are you hoping for from this thread op? If your DH does not show you the level of respect or communication that you’d like it really does beg the question why you’re with him. It’s not for other people to emotionally support you through a shit marriage.

When you say someone else what exactly does that look like?

If it's a person of the opposite sex then that's an emotional affair.
If it's with a family member is that really fair to dump on them?

Or is finding your own self esteem and self confidence better?

I don’t know. I think there’s something in the old saying that you can’t get everything you need from just one person.

In many successful marriages I have observed, the wife (and probably the husband although I’m not so good at guessing his perspective) has good circles of support - sometimes therapeutic and sometimes just lots of friendships- and hobbies, and doesn’t rely on her husband to meet all her emotional needs.

I agree to this

How to find friendships which give me understanding, communication and conversation without turning them into emotional affairs or a dumping ground

That's a better question.

Find friendship through shared interests. Could be anything from a walking group to a yoga class and everything in between. Have a look at U3A see if there are any courses you might like to try.
Volunteering.

It is about my self esteem also. I can see how I have just taken the man as he came and did everything possible to marry him without realising that I had other choices also