Gaslighting husband…..what to do?

[FJT1977]

My husband had taken to gaslighting me - he’ll say something mean and then literally argue with me that ‘I didn’t say anything’ when I confront him. This evening I heard him calling me a ‘horrible person’ and when I asked him why he said that, he denied saying it and made out I was imagining things!
When my husband does talk about me or calls me names (to himself), he doesn’t exactly whisper which is why I can clearly hear him… I would also like to add that my husband is a crappy liar so his face always gives him away as he has the deer caught in headlights look about him…, what would you do?

I'm not minimising anything. But to the perpetrator it IS a game.

You need to plan hard to leave so you can go, decisively and irreversibly, without discussion. You know you can never be safe with this man, however much he might change his tune when you leave .

Depression and stress are no excuse for being horrible to someone else.
You can suffer from either or both without taking it out on someone who didn't cause it and doesn't deserve it.

Is he getting treatment for the depression/taking any steps to reduce or cope with the stress?

In any case, if he denies gaslighting you, presumably he isn't using either of those conditions as an excuse for his nastiness—you're trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. But there isn't any. He is being abusive.

I wouldn't record him, it will just give him ammunition to keep being vile to you.
I would seriously start making plans to leave, go all out to try and get another job. This will eventually affect your mental health, it will erode your self worth , your confidence and then you will be even more reliant on him.