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Original poster

Crying when dropping off DS with his Dad

30 replies

GoldandS · 27/07/2025 07:08

Separated from H and moved out of the family home one week ago. I’m a frequent poster and struggling so much. Recently I’ve been crying my eyes out when I drop my son off at the family home after seeing him. I dropped him off after a lovely day with him yesterday but I’m ashamed to say that I started crying when in McDonald’s with my teen - I told him that Mammy was a bit sad but I had had a lovely day with him.

Dropped him off with H and I’m so embarrassed to say that I had a breakdown in the living room and bawled my eyes out. DS had gone upstairs by then but I feel like I’m being ripped in half 😔

At that moment I would have given anything for things to be the way they used to be with us all watching a film together, eating dinner and chatting about our day.

To go back to an empty house pretty much killed me. H was even worried that I might do something silly.

The loss of the family unit feels horrifying and I now feel a sense of horror at what I have done.

DS hasn’t stayed overnight yet with me as he will need time to adjust. It feels like I’ve lost him and I feel such an intense grief that I can barely breathe. Youngest was at a sleepover but youngest has been staying over with me thankfully.

Sorry for the ramblings.

OP posts:

ginasevern · 27/07/2025 12:23

GoldandS · 27/07/2025 12:17

I will do that in future to protect myself. I’m feeling very homesick for the family home right now even though I love my new home, it’s really beautiful 💕

Show quote history

Of course you're feeling homesick and you will do for a while to come. It's like a bereavement. But it will get better, it really will OP.

BellissimoGecko · 27/07/2025 14:40

GoldandS · 27/07/2025 10:54

Thank you, it’s a learning process. I was chatty and normal in the car but it felt worse just seeing them for the drive and getting dropped off on my own. Probably worse for the kids too. The impact on them is awful. I was so naive and had tunnel vision just thinking about my marriage (I didn’t love him) but pulling our oldest between two houses now feels so wrong for him. Youngest is quite happy and adaptable. I keep thinking I probably should have stayed and kept my family together.

You can’t live like that. Leaving was the right thing. But of course it will take time to adjust. Have you thought about counselling?

waterrat · 27/07/2025 14:46

My mum used to cry in front of us kids about my dad and the break up. I hated it so much. Sorry I know on your side its tough but they need you to put on a brave face now.

They need to see you outwardly tell them you can and will cope with this.

Twelftytwo · 27/07/2025 15:42

Yes it is bad to cry infront of the kids when they're adjusting.