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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Narcissistic coparent playing games?

4 replies

Clmtht · 24/07/2025 23:07

My ex (who has very narcissistic tendencies) started flirting with me a couple of weeks after finding out that I was in a new relationship.
That relationship ended (for other reasons, not my ex), and he continued to flirt and suggest sleeping together for old times sake etc.
I went along with it, knowing its some sort of game but I was curious too after 2 years. He then suggested we take our one year old son out together for the day, maybe once a week. I said okay, but maybe twice a year as we arent together and I dont want to confuse our son. Also its not appropriate if we were to meet other people.
Anyway, last week he invited me to his mums birthday gathering as I was picking up our son anyway, he just asked me to come early and stay for a bit. Thats when we slept together. This week we are due to go on this family day out to the natural history museum.
Why is he doing this even though I'm now single?
Genuine want to coparent nicely or some other agenda?
He's been distant from me since his mums birthday.
I have no romantic interest, nor interest in reconnecting as I know it would be a disaster and theres already a lot of water under the bridge. However I'm just finding it all a bit strange.
Any ideas or advice?

OP posts:
Rayqueen · 25/07/2025 05:02

Your finding it strange yet keep sleeping with him as that's what I'm finding strange that you finished yet continue to randomly sleep together so ye your all mixed up somehow

Allthatshines1992 · 06/10/2025 23:49

I'd stop having a sexual relationship with him. You could end up pregnant with him again or end up with an STI/STD. I think the co-parenting outings are a good idea but best to keep things platonic.

CandyRuby · 07/10/2025 00:08

Because you are having sex with him, that’s why.

AgentJohnson · 07/10/2025 07:09

FFS!!!!! Do you understand what narcissism is? Clearly not if you asking why he is behaving the way he is. If you want to sleep with your Ex then carry on but he’s an EX for a reason. Your armchair diagnosis isn’t some joker you can play to somehow make yourself the victim of your chosen behaviour.

You acknowledge that playing happy families with your Ex will confuse your son, so what do you do, you play happy families and sleep with him out of ‘curiosity’. I am interested to know what you’d label your behaviour as OP?

Here’s a tip, grow up, stop analysing people (you aren’t qualified) and own YOUR behaviour.

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