Is there there any hope to find a partner in this day and age.

[Ukguy4USAwoman]

Hey all, first post here, I've been trying different means of finding a partner online but have had hardily any luck. I've been in forums, chat rooms, dating sites but majority of it is filled with fake profiles, bots, degenerate talks etc. I am trying to find a woman who wants to start a family and also live in a off grid eco village and become self-sufficient.
My question is do women this day and age still interested in Homesteading, living off the land etc? if so what's an ideal place to find a woman like that? I know many will say in meet in person but i am currently looking for a women who is more into prepping, survivalist mindset and no woman in my town is into that.
I'm 44 years old, is it too late for me? should I just give up on the partner I desire? For every scammer, catfish you come across the more it makes you want to give up, and I'm kind of running out of faith.

I am trying to find a woman who wants to start a family and also live in a off grid eco village and become self-sufficient.

sorry to say it like this, but you need to focus on relationship first, not whether a woman can produce a child for you. First things first 👍

It’s hard enough trying to get a message back never mind find someone who’s unique enough to fit your list of qualities in a partner so I wish you luck …

it’s a minefield out there .

I suspect you just need to be very open in your profile but your dating pool is going to be extremely small .

You need to move to a backward place like Wales, lots of eco loving people there.

In dating I met a lot of guys with a kind of escapist fantasy, that wanted to live in vans, on boats, off grid etc. I got to the point of specifically checking this early on to rule them out.

40s seems very late to be thinking about establishing a self sufficient lifestyle, a potential wife/mum of your kids would want to see that you have reliable means to support the family through pregnancy, maternity, illness etc. Living off the land must be very hard especially as you get older.

I think women tend to be more practical. Parenting, especially of babies, is a lot easier with a lot of modern stuff. Feck doing it without a washing machine & tumble dryer for example. It’s nice to think you can afford to save for your kid to go to uni, not that they will just inherit a bit of grass and maybe a goat. It’s nice to live close to family when you have kids.
Someone who wants to rebel against the demands of modern life seems unlikely to cope well with the demands of parenting.

Honestly I’d reflect on what makes you want to disconnect from mainstream culture, what you stand to potentially lose out on as a consequence, and whether it’s really worth it.

What you need is a therapist, not a relationship…..

Its not a very appealing offer tbh not surprised noones interested ...

Are you living off grid just now? I suggest if you want that life you make it happen for yourself and then you are more likely to attract someone into that lifestyle.

Also sounds like you've watched a bit too much Tradwifes content online 🙄

From my knowledge of the people interested in this sort of life (pretty much YouTube and mostly American) the majority are men so the pool will be pretty small.

You are also pretty old to be wanting to start a family. Realistically you’d be in your mid to late 40s by the time you’d got to the stage of knowing each other well enough for a woman to be confident in starting a family with you so you’d need someone 10-15 years younger. I’d be asking why you’re looking now.

What are you bringing to the proverbial table? Do you have decent funds to buy the land you’ll need? Do you have the skills and strength you’ll need? How realistic are your plans? Have you tested your dream in any way or is it all an escapist fantasy? Where is this eco village? Why are you not already there?

I do feel for you. I have had similar dreams when I was younger but unless you’re offering some kind of appealing ready made package for a much younger woman you’re unlikely to find someone who will take you on as a risk.

That is my perfect life to be honest! My husband has made me a sahm so I’m halfway there.

What age women are you looking for? I presume not 44 if you want them to start a family…

No offence but that sort of lifestyle is one you tend to grow into together. A 20-something woman is unlikely to want to live a trad-wife life with you.

I actually think it’s best to be transparent about wanting children - saves getting to know people who don’t want any or don’t want any for a while. My husband and I both stated we wanted children on our dating profiles over 10 years ago! I’m afraid I can’t offer OP any advice, but wouldn’t it be wonderful if you found your future wife on mumsnet!

Really, was that called for?

With wanting this particular lifestyle you're best bet is surely to meet someone via this niche community online. I know people who have done similar with fandom communities.

That said it will be harder if it's more male dominated. Also someone who wants to have children in this lifestyle might prefer someone closer to her age.

Not many 44 year old women want or can start a family. I presume you are a man looking for a younger woman to reproduce with?

I’d think you are more likely to meet someone in a group for like minded people or on a course or volunteering for a related organisation.

Ok wow, yes some valid questions and some insult. To the nice people thanks for replies and questions, I think I'll just hand in the towel. To those who insult and saying I'm backwards, maybe learn from your ancestors instead denigrating the way they lived, humans have survived a long time from simple living of the land. Peace

Offensive and unnecessary comment.

Have you spent much time with like minded people? Because actually, I think there are lots women out there who could potentially fit that profile, depending very much on what you are like (if you come across as preachy and controlling you will scare them away!) If you are kind and genuine and prepared to accept any criteria your potential mate might have, go and spend some time in a self-sufficient community (there are plenty if you look) and see who you find there.

As what you're looking for is very niche I think you'll have to be very direct about what you're looking for or consider where you can compromise.

Well you'll be looking for a woman in her early 30s I'd imagine. She'll need a year or two to size you up before she lets you knock her up at let's say 35.

If you're a good man and, crucially, you can demonstrate a track record of possessing and applying the masculine qualities needed to make off-grid living a reality, then I bet there are a million 30-yo women out there who'd find the life you're offering attractive.

Your are offering it though aren't you?

How's your animal husbandry? Have you bought the land yet or have realistic plan to do so? Can you strip down and rebuild an engine? What structures have you built yourself? Can you hunt and fish? Wire up solar panels and wind turbines? Rainwater collection and purification systems? Ever built a composting toilet?

You'll need to bring all this and more to the table son.

Oh don’t go OP. You always get snarky stuff in this site. You’ll have to be tougher than that if you’re trying to date.
Is your user name indicative of trying to find someone in the US? Good idea. You say humans have lived off the land but actually it has ben a long time since a hunter/gatherer or smallholder type existence was realistic in the UK. You need lots of land. Or a side hustle. More likely to get what you need in the US where they still have some space.

OP, I suggest you join an existing commune. Get established, get to know the other people in the commune, then take it from there.

Are you already living off the land and off grid? That would make it easier to find a girlfriend, if you're already part of that community and have an online community also.

It's a lifestyle choice that wouldn't appeal to many people, a fertile woman ten years younger than you may have a range of options in men to date, living like an 'ancestor' while pregnant and child rearing may not seem appealing. Is it? I can't think of anything but I'm the absolute opposite of all that.

You'd need to date for a few years before marriage, at that point your sperm quality would have deteriorated and increased likelihoods of neuro diversity etc. in a kid, would you get sperm frozen now as an option?

Hi OP, you will find your type of person at “green” festivals or alternative festivals, nature-based festivals, talks, the Green Party etc, environmental causes etc. You could go to Into the Wild Gathering (festival) in Sussex (people come from all over and often live off grid/alternative) or stay at TiPi valley (off-grid community) in Wales.

However, as pp said, unless you are not from the UK I am surprised you are not exploring these options or know these avenues already. ?