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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How to end things

9 replies

Heidi5764 · 22/07/2025 12:36

I've been dating a guy for 3 months - huge love bomber - lots of red flags. Went to speak to my therapist and she says she thinks he's in another relationship from the way he's acting. He has started to pull away / give breadcrumbs. He left my message unopened for a couple of days and popped up this morning saying he's going to be busy now until weekend/next week. I have felt rejected, upset, but feel like I'm done now tolerating bullshit and his lack of genuineness.

Do I send him a message telling him I'm done and no longer interested, or do I just ignore him now and not respond and quietly disappear (like he does although he disappears and re-enters)?

OP posts:
TwistedWonder · 22/07/2025 13:05

Personally I’d send a 👍 and leave it there.

Sunrise8888 · 22/07/2025 13:11

He wasted 3 months of your time. It’s up to you what you really want to do and what you feel is right to do. There are various options - just block him -and say nothing. Send a message explaining it’s not working out for you or disappear quietly and never reply to his message. To be honest maybe he’s waiting for you to say something, I don’t know. But it doesn’t look good, he’s a time waster.

80s · 22/07/2025 13:14

I'd be polite: "Thanks for letting me know about your plans but I'm afraid I'm not interested in meeting again. Wish you all the best in future."

iamnotalemon · 22/07/2025 13:26

You deserve so much better! just leave him on read and block him. Give him a taste of his own medicine.

TheAmusedQuail · 22/07/2025 13:34

Give him the energy he's given you.

Ghost him.

Anonusername1234 · 22/07/2025 13:38

80s · 22/07/2025 13:14

I'd be polite: "Thanks for letting me know about your plans but I'm afraid I'm not interested in meeting again. Wish you all the best in future."

Is do this! Then I’d block him. And I wouldn’t cry over spilt milk, just recognise what an utter waste of my time he was.

SpinachSpinachMoreSpinach · 22/07/2025 13:38

If you need help with such a basic issue, to the extent that you are posting for advice on MN, you clearly are not ready for dating.

keep having therapy and read some self help books. Women Who Love Too Much would be an excellent start.

MrsGuyOfGisbo · 22/07/2025 14:07

Anonusername1234 · 22/07/2025 13:38

Is do this! Then I’d block him. And I wouldn’t cry over spilt milk, just recognise what an utter waste of my time he was.

This.
No reason to be childish and manipulative by ghosting.

Heidi5764 · 22/07/2025 21:10

Hes love bombed me, now showing narcissistic traits and very strange behaviour. It’s made me think I don’t need to give him clarity, he’s got a big ego and I’m not sure he deserves a message telling him I’m not interested. But then part of me thinks it goes against my grain

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