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[Tinkerisdead]

My SIl has always been quite dominating in my DH's family apparently. However since i met him 2 years ago i just feel at the brunt of all her snipes etc. DH assures me she has always lied or exagerated stories for attention seeking effect. no-one ever challenges this as she cuts them out of her life if confronted.

I got married last year and SIL stormed out of wedding when we asked crying baby to be taken out during speeches. She then yelled at my mum,had a row with her DH, refused to wear her corsage etc etc and it ended with my MIL not talking to her for acting like a brat.

No-one has spoken about it since we came back from honeymoon. I got pregnant straight away and so we have not really seen anyone as i have been so sick. we seen them three times but all very pleasant and no-one has mentioned the incident.

Our mutual friends(through DH and SIL) came to see us this weekend and asked if there was a rift between us and SIL? we said no, we havent really seen anyone as enjoying first few months of preg in private but when we have seen them its been fine.

The friends have said that my SIl says there is a rift and our friends have said they want to stay out of it, that when our baby is born SIL is planning another one to ensure attention is back on herself and they find it competitive. They said they dont want to be a part of it as they want to enjoy all of our children??

Im horrified, this is my DH's best friend and now he has said he is stepping away due to a rift we know nothing about! My Dh needs his friend and his sister is telling all kinds of stories which has now resulted in DH not getting time with his friend when he needs it most.

I feel like before i came along they were all fine and now DH is married my SIL has shifted away from him. it breaks my heart. I cant talk to her as i feel like im the issue and i dont know why. i just dont know how to deal with it, DH, MIl etc all agree her behaviour is untoward but no-one challenges her. if i say something i am just going to reinforce the perception that i am the problem. I love my FIL, MIL etc but ive never experienced this with a sister in law?

she's a grown up acting like a 2 yr old - it's her with the problems, not you.

Your DH friend needs to grow a backbone - he's a friend... he doesn't need to get involved or stay away - he can see you and see them without "but your MY friend... not his" from SIL surely?

Are there just your dh and sil as siblings? No others?

If so, I would say that it didn't matter who your husband maried, she was going to be in competition with them, so I wouldn't take her personally. She's a bit odd. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be. If you walked away, she would be horrible to dh's new partner. So don't shoulder the responsibility for this. That is needlessly punishing yourself.

Exactly how is dh's best friend going to enjoy all your children if he backs away from dh? I don't think he thought that through very well.

Agree Lewisfan. If dh is a doctor (as name implies) he must arrange a backbone transplant for his bf

ha ha ha my Dh isnt a doctor( name refers to valentino rossi moto GP rider)

Just DH and SIL no other siblings and what you guys have said rings true. It truly is like being in competition with another woman which i would only have expected from him mum.

Ive said that they can all be friends independantly as they were before me, we dont need to a "six". me and DH, SIl and her DH and these two friends. The man is my DH's best friend married to SIL best friend. The friends invited us for dinner and SIl found out and went mad that we had met without her but i want to befriend DH's best mate without being compelled to mix with SIl too. it truly is "there my friend not yours" mentality. ive told my DH ive never known anything like it since school and he can have his friends and i'll stick to my own. i cant believe i got sucked into such pathetic schoolyard crap just by marrying someone i love!!!