Help. What do I say to him?

[OrmIrian]

A friend of mine, married with a teenage son, has just upped sticks for a week in Corfu with no word to her DH or son. She is refusing to speak to either of them on the phone although she is in touch with her mother and one other friend. I saw her DH and DS briefly yesterday - both bewildered and upset as you might upset. Lad is coming to play with my son (not a best mate but dad has to work and there isn't anyone else to look after him today). Dad hasn't told him exactly what's going on. He doesn't really know what's going on or whether she's coming home after the week is up. What do I say to him? Can I just pretend it isn't happening?

Apparently there were problems but no-one realised how serious.

How old is her DS? Difficult position for you but I would imagine it would be best to support her DH in whatever he has told the DS.

My xP did exactly this but had no contact with anyone (turned out to be an affair). Our children were distraught, as was I and until I knew what was happening, chose to tell them he was at a sleep over and having loads of fun. That way, though they still missed him, they worried less.

When friends helped me with the children around that time, they distracted the children as much as they could but when asked directly, supported my 'story'. It helped.

Very sad- something very similar happened to us (me and younger brother) as teenagers- I was 17 and my brother was 14.

Mother left one night and we didnt know where she was for two weeks- she never came back to the family home.

Completely fucked up my brothers head and I hold her responsible for the mess his life has become.

Hope this young chap is OK. Its devastating.

Thanks. Sorry to hear that both of you have experienced this from different positions.

He's 13.

I just find it so odd and out of character. Hoping she just needed some space and can't face talking to the people she cares about. I can sort of understand how you'd get to that point but it still shocks me.

Aw, poor lad. Mine are a lot younger so it was easier to produce a 'cover story' and also easier to distract them.

Hold tight, at some point everything will become clearer. The wait really is horrendous though

He's just arrived. Gone upstairs with my DS#1 to play with the pet rats and just mooch I think. DS knows that his mum isn't around atm but not why.

The waiting is horrendous as you say