Am I in the wrong?

[CodieJ]

I won’t go into that much detail but my partners cousin a few years ago threatened to b*rn my parents house down knowing full well my at the time one year old was staying there over night. 4 years later I’m being basically bullied into forgive and forget but my partner and he’s family for example it was my two boys christening a few months ago and I refused to invite my parents cousin because I didn’t want someone like that around my children and around my family and he’s side of the family had something to say about it. Anyway now my partner is saying we’re not getting married unles he’s cousin is there to be best man and I feel like yet again I’m being blackmailed and bullied but he’s side of the family are saying I’m holding a grudge😬
what do you guys think?

I would shrug, say “Okay then”, pack his bags and wave bye bye.

Your partner's family sound rough as arseholes. Why would you want to marry into this Shameless shitshow? Why would you not have ended the relationship when the threat was made? What did the police say?

Never mind the criminal cousin (making death threats is a crime), I’d be running a mile away from your partner. Honestly OP, you and DC do not need him or his horrible family in your life.

First reply nails it
You shouldn’t even have to ask. Your DP clearly doesn’t give a shit about your feelings so why on earth would you even for a nanosecond consider marrying them?!

If your DP won't put you first even after his cousin's threats then he never will, to expect you to have that cousin as best man is beyond unreasonable. Save yourself years of trouble Op, don't marry into that family

Bloody hell, your partner and his family sound rough as fuck. Why on earth would you want to be around any of them? Including your arse of a partner?

I'd think hard and long before u marry him and into that family