I have an on off kind of partner. Have a child with him and a child from a previous relationship. Now this man is very controlling and thinks women should act a certain way (very dark ages) controls what partners wear/where they go monopolises time. Won’t have his partners even look at other men thinks it is absolutely disrespectful - thinks that women he is with should be covered up so not to have other men look at them - no make up don’t go anywhere without him that kind of guy. He is nice when he feels like it really nice some times but not nice when he’s not nice. You aren’t to break the rules with him. Never been violent but had threatened so previously. Not an easy relationship to leave (tried and failed many times). This is just to name a few ‘rules’. However now have a child with him. He has got other children. I have said enough is enough and I don’t want to set that kind of example to my kids because I don’t believe that is how a relationship should be. Have I done the right thing?
with doing this he obviously wants to see our child on his own. I do everything all feeds all changes we don’t live together. He would visit everyday for a couple hours and video call. Not a relationship in my eyes and I feel I am living pretty much a single life and being a single mum anyways but also living by his rules and for what. The only thing that bothers me is him taking our child on his own as he’s never done it before (as we’ve been ‘together’) and I worry if they’ll be ok or if they will struggle without me. Still a baby very young at 6 months old.
please be kind - I do know iv been in this trauma bond and I have done a lot of research. It’s not so easy as ‘just leave’. But I do want to create a better future for me and my children.